Orlando in Love, Episode 38: Unrepentant Thieves Tonight, I'll tell a story~of a noble baron and his love. First, though, I must inform you~of a pair who were not /quite/ as good I'll give their names: you may recall~the story when the African, the thief /Brunello/, stole away the sword from Queen /Marfisa's/ hand; Marfisa, that strong saracen who's known as "the Invincible"! -- He /could/ have slipped away with ease, so fast that he'd be hard to see, since he was mounted on a steed more spirited than any known. This horse, the thief had stolen just before he stole Marfisa's sword. He ran away: he _seemed_ afraid and stayed out front, not too far, then, circling swiftly round the plain, he'd sneak up on her from behind. Then, just to show how much he cared, {mime taking off shirt} he'd _snap_ his jerkin at her head, @ and then rise up (now listen hard) and bare his naked rear at her! @ -- She pursued him for fifteen days, subsisting mainly on some leaves. That false thief, who is highly skilled, supports his flight with other fare. As he is fast (and daring too) whatever tavern he beholds, he enters for a bite to eat,~then flees. He never pays his bill. After he drinks, he lifts the cup @ and claims that he has paid the host, by merely calling, "Your good health!" (L) And when the tavern men and maids {+nasal villain} pursued with pitchers and and with pots,~he rode away. He licked his chops, and he showed them a thousand smirks. -- And still Marfisa followed him, "Stop him!" she cried out, "Stop that thief!" (R) Everyone said, "A thief indeed!" (C) That glutton made them all lament because he stole the choicest bites. He did not wait, nor ask for scraps, but always took the stuffed and fat. Brunello stops a thousand times: he slows... he slows... she closes in... @ but he slips off, flees like the wind. -- That fervent woman followed him~for fifteen days, as I have said, and she'd become extremely weak, from eating only grass and leaves. She will not stop till he is caught, her heart is so presumptuous. She can't see her pursuit's no use: He rides a horse, and she's on foot. You see, her charger lost its force -- on the eighth day, it fell, a corpse. Her stallion dead, she used her legs~instead, and armed with hauberk, sped~so swift that greyhound from the leash -- or arrow swooping from the bow, or falcon diving from the sky~to valley -- would be left behind. -- Strength faltering, and long-fatigued, Marfisa bore her armor~as a heavy load; so, since she scorned~Brunello's /force,/ she stripped it off. After she set aside that weight, she ran so fast, she was so fleet, she gave Brunello several scares, although his steed flew like the breeze. Often she came so close he thought~that she would mount his horse's back, and so he raced at breakneck speed, spurring with full force his good steed, Marfisa always at his heels. Suddenly, something _new_ appeared, distracting her, who, otherwise, would have chased hard until she'd died. -- In her path rides a knight, his lovely damsel rides along his side. This knight's the baron Brandymart, his lady's Fiordiligi. Friends of Orlando's, they both searched for him, while riding through these woods. Marfisa did not know these two, nor had they ever done her harm But when the warrior maiden, raging at the /world/ due to that thief, sees them, she /charges/ them at once! Whoever's close will feel her rage! And though she'd taken off her armor and she had neither sword nor horse and Brandymart was fully armed, her courage was so copious she challenged Brandymart to duel. -- But he refused; he disapproved. To hit an unprotected maid~seemed shameful -- a disgrace! -- to him. Surly Marfisa did not pause, but _grabbed_ Fiordiligi from her steed and ran as fast as any breeze. She climbed a nearby outcrop whose~top was most difficult to reach, but that bold maid seemed like a bird! Now Brandymart set after them~without delay, and yet that knight~lost ground and soon was left behind. The rock-hewn cliff-side was so steep~that Brandymart, dressed in his armor, couldn't ascend that jagged height. So, Brandymart began to strip~as, meanwhile, Queen Marfisa bore~the maiden to the highest cliff, meaning to fling her to the ground. -- When Fiordiligi saw how close~she was to death, her wails grew loud, and the knight Brandymart howled out~his grief and rage. He almost died. He was stuck in his armor, with~no way to rescue her in sight. If he climbed now, he'd climb in vain; she'd still be hurtled to the plain. So Brandymart began with prayers~and tears to *beg* Marfisa, bold, to have a heart, not be so fierce: he offers his own life instead. The lofty damsel smiled a bit, then said, "This chatter -- knock it off! (L) You want to rescue her? You must~give me your weapons and your horse." -- The knight thought this a fair exchange; he'd give his heart to have the maid. The queen kept her end of the deal: after she took his gear and steed, she freed the maiden she'd brought down,~then armed. She mounted. She was gone. Brandymart climbed up on his damsel's~palfrey and set her just behind. Now, as they rode across the land, they reached a poplar near a stream, and at the top, or nearly so, a villain shouted "Gallop, go! (L) There's stuff to pilfer down below!" The knight, who understood their language, stopped.at.once, not sure what to do. The look-out was a thief, he knew, calling companions out for loot. Brandymart -- with no sword nor mail -- knew no defense that would avail. Already seven men or so, some on foot, some on horse, approached. -- "No need to stay and wait for them!" (R) said Brandymart unto himself, and started fleeing through the forest. But nothing that knight did could shake them. Some shouted, "Stand!" and some yelled threats; _Thirty_ or more were in pursuit. Oh, how ashamed that baron feels to flee before this shabby band. If he'd possessed his arms and steed he'd not have stepped back half a span! He reached a fountain in a field as he raced down the narrow path, The knight, who fled unwillingly -- saw a dead king, beside that fount, who still had all his armor on. When Brandymart saw this dead king he did not hesitate at all but took the naked sword the corpse~still held @ and then jumped off his horse. He wrapped his left arm in a cape @ and faced the brigands with that blade. -- No baron ever was so brave: He sliced this man and he pierced that, plunged through one's chest, another's side; But there's no need to tell you more -- with that sword he so smoothly worked that he soon slaughtered those marauders. Just one unlucky man survived (escaping, for a time, his fate). He ran off, wounded in the thigh, with one arm cleanly cut away. He hurried to the hideaway where savage Barigaccio waited, the son of.a.most notorious pirate, he, Barigaccio, was a bandit. This Barigaccio's size surpassed~that of his sire, and he was strong. The wounded man was terrified but came to him and told him all -- told how their black assault went wrong -- and then he died before his eyes. He fell before him, pouring blood~from every vein, and moved no more. Fierce Barigaccio grew enraged -- a wondrous thing -- seized his large club, put on the armor he would need, and rode Batoldo: that's his steed. This horse was marvelous and strong, his eyes as red as any fire, and his hide was as black as coal, save for one white spot on his forehead. When Barigaccio'd saddled up, he spurred the horse and never stopped. -- Brandymart, who'd stayed in the field after he'd thrashed the band of thieves, saw that the armed king by the fount was _Agrrican_ (he knew his shield), slain by Orlando at that spring, as I've told in another tale. His crown, composed of priceless gems~and gold, was still upon his head. But Brandymart did not molest~his corpse; he acted with respect. The arms, but not the overvest,~he took off, kissed the face with love, and said "Excuse me, I've no choice. (R) I'm forced to take your armor off! It is not fear that *I* might die~that makes me strip you, but that I~can't stand by while my _lady's_ killed. "What's more, I'm sure if you could hear, (R) you'd show the chivalry for which~you're famous. Hearing what I ask, you would not turn down my request." The cavalier spoke thus -- his heart~was full of pity -- to the king, whose handsome looks had not decayed, as if he were just three hours dead. -- As pensive Brandymart stood there, he heard a great noise in the wood: 'Twas Barigaccio trampling leaves, confounding branches, trunks, and trees. Quickly the baron bold put on~the king's equipment, mail and plate, taking the sword /Tranchera/ and~the helmet Solomon had made. He had just finished arming when~the highwayman caught up with him. Everywhere Barigaccio saw~his comrades, butchered on that meadow. He stopped a minute, looked at them,~and said, "To hell with all you /swill!/ (L) I could not care less you've been killed! If just one cavalier did this -- as God may witness -- I'd prefer~that my gang be this many turds! I aim to hang this knight at once -- I'll hang your corpses up with his!" The villain moves tow'rds Brandymart. /He/ was on foot, and when the thief~noticed this, he climbed down from his charger. His motive was not chivalry: Rather, he greatly loved his steed and worried lest the champion~would kill it, as he might, on foot. He did not issue any more~threats as he stalked towards Brandymart, to whose eye he was like a giant. His armor was of scales and leather; he always held a shield of bone, an iron club, and wore a sword. -- He charged him without wasting words and both of them began tof flail. He walloped Brandymart's fine shield, and where he struck, he knocked a piece~away, as if it were a gourd. The baron answered him and cleaved~in two that cudgel with his sword, slicing it cleanly as a reed. Now Barigaccio felt great scorn. He jumped back six yards, more or less, and drew his sword without delay, menaced and cursed the cavalier, said the cut club would cost him dear. But Brandymart still charged at him and both began exchanging thrusts. Over- and underhand they swing. Such varied strokes were never seen. Brandymart swings Tranchera and~chops off a chunk of armor, but~that strong thief wallops him right back, slicing through metal to his shirt. The fearsome battle gathers force. Their strokes are boundless, horrid, dark. -- The cavalier is quite amazed to find a /bandit/ with _such_ skill. In all his life, he's never seen~anyone quite this violent. To Brandymart it seemd most wrong that such a bold man was a thief, and so, when they had fought for long, he drew himself aside, and said, "I don't know who you are, (R) or why~Fortune has made you do such work, but I'd say you're the boldest man I know beneath the moon on earth. "Now I can see that Fate is set: (R) By evening or the dark of night, one of us on this field will die. I hope it won't be he who's right. "But if you want to leave this /trade/~that you engage in -- (R) that of _thief_ -- I'll be your knight, I'll say I'm beaten; I'll bear your honor everywhere. "What will you do? (R) Do you believe~you have no other means to live? Leave off this work; don't be in doubt: a man like you won't go without!" -- The robber answered, "What I do~is done by all great lords on earth. (L) They massacre their enemies~in war just to enrich their states. I hold up seven, maybe ten -- they madly kill ten thousand men. And they do so much worse than me, taking what they don't even need!" Brandymart told him, "Stealing _is_~a sin -- (R) that's what the world believes -- but when it's done to serve the state, it isn't bad, and it's excused." The thief said, "Better pardoned is~the sinner who can blame _himself_ -- (L) and I confess that I take all~I can from those less powerful. "I won't hurt you as badly as~I could -- (L) you preach so beautifully! If you give me the _lady_ there and all the armor that you wear, and let me have what's in your purse -- I'll let you go then, neat and clean." -- When Brandymart had heard all that~he said, he thought, "A bad man can't~escape the foulness of his life -- (R) not in September, not in May, not in cold air, nor when it's hot. A frog will never leave the mud!" No more conversing: with contempt,~his shield on, he defied the thief. This new assault was furious. They cracked their shields and armaments, and both were covered with red blood. There was no further talk of truce: their one desire was to conclude. Brandymart grips his naked sword, resolved to do that bandit in, and takes a cruel, two-handed swing~at Barigaccio, side to side, @ and with a smash he _cuts_ his shield~of bone, @ and then his *arm* beneath~and halfway through the bandit's back -- @ No plates could stop that great attack. Then Barigaccio fell to earth, calling out for the _devil,_ cursing. Brandymart tried to comfort him, but he pronounced still viler oaths, and soon, that giant scoundrel died. -- The knight abandons that foul thief and with his lady starts to leave; then the black horse, Batoldo, gives~a whinny from across the field. Brandymart thought him excellent, and he told Fiordiligi this: "Your palfrey would be too weighed down, (R) bearing us both, since I'm now armed. I'll commandeer this worthy horse, just as I took these arms, this sword. It would be foolish -- and unwise -- to /leave/ what Fortune offers us. These dead men have no use for them, since they've got nothing more to fear." He spoke, and he approached the steed, seized his reins and then mounted him. Brandymart rode with Fiordiligi, finding some strange and fearful things that forced him to employ his blade. But I have reached _this_ story's end. Ladies and lords who've listened here, God keep you well and of a mind~to come enjoy the next you'll hear.