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The BorD files, episode 7:

HMOs are evil and must be destroyed.  We all know the battle cry, we can recite
it from memory.  We all have a story to tell about the crazy health care system
we have in place in the United States.

Last Saturday, my wife had to go to the ER.  I will try to go light on the 
details.  I am sure she does not want her medical history blasted around the
internet.  Suffice it to say, attention was needed, it was obvious that she was
in pain and in need of assistance.  The staff on duty could only nod and say, 
that's nice, take your seat, we will get to you when we get to you.  

Yes, eventually they do get to you.  Then you get to spend 5 hours waiting 
around for test results, at which time you are written a prescription and told
to follow up with the doctor on Monday.

Monday rolls around.  You call the doctor.  He cannot see you without a
referral.  Of course he can't.  So, you call your primary care provider.  They
fax over a referral.  The doctor can see you now, for you see, the referral
means that the doctor will get paid.  

Now you go see the doctor.  The specialist.  Who has a  'practice.'  I love
that.  Knowing that this clown is practicing on me.  So he goes, yup, I know
what it is.  Yup, I might have caused it when I operated on you a few years 
back.  I sorta left something in there, and I hoped it would take care of 
itself.  Sorry about that.

Oh, no problem.  After all, you are the doctor.  So when can we schedule this
outpatient procedure that we need done?  Well, hold on now sonny.  First we 
need to get a cat scan.  After we have the cat scan, then we can do the simple
procedure.  You know.  To keep me in practice.  

Ok, when can we do the cat scan?  Well, lets check with scheduling.  Scheduling
says it will be about 2-3 weeks.  Oh, what a shame that you will be on percocet
over the holidays.  

Ok Mr. Doctor, this hospital is busy, can we perform the cat scan at another
facility?  I just called this one on my own, they can get is in the day after
tomorrow.

Well, I don't know if insurance will pay for it, it might come out of your
pocket.  

(You know you are getting pissed when $700 out of pocket doesn't even
bother you.)

I do not give a rats stinky behind, just do the cat scan, and then
do the simple outpatient procedure.

Well hold on there sonny, it is now 5pm, we need to continue this discussion
tomorrow.  (ARGH.)

So tomorrow rolls around.  The badgering has paid off.  The doctor has agreed to
call this a stat case, a case that can jump the line and get the cat scan done
right away.  Thank you mister doctor man.  Thank you for finally agreeing that
pain medication for a few weeks is not the answer to this problem.

So, we have the cat scan done.  They have faxed the results to you.  You have
them in your hand.  When should we schedule this simple outpatient procedure?
Not so fast sonny boy.  It is 5pm again.  We need to continue this discussion
tomorrow.  (ARGH.)

Let me get this straight.  This has now gone on Saturday (6 hours in ER),
Sunday, (all day, nothing new, no good drugs), Monday, (finally got an office
visit, a prescription for good drugs), Tuesday (fighting over when we schedule
the cat scan), Wednesday (finally get the cat scan).  And we still do not know
when the surgery will be.  

Yup.  You have it right.

Ok then.

Riddle me this batman.  Why didn't you order the cat scan on Saturday?  You knew
what it was, you knew you were going to do surgery, you knew you would need a
cat scan first.  Can you tell my why you didn't do the cat scan on Saturday?
Then we could have set up the surgery already.

I didn't think of it.  Remember, it is only practice. 

What is wrong with medicine in America?  Nothing gets done if you don't have
the green.  Nobody, from nurses to doctors to hospital support staff gives a
rat's behind about you.  

We went through this last time without insurance.  I thought for sure that the
only reason we had such a hard time was our lack of insurance.  We were able to
pay off the medical bills in a year, we got insurance, and figured that it 
would solve our problems.  It doesn't.  The plain truth is that they just do
not care.

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