MORMON FUNNIES

   Why did the Lamanites have sore Knees?
   Too many Knee Fights. (Nephites)

   What do you get when you cross a Mormon and a robber?
   A basement full of stolen canned goods.

   Did you hear about the guy that got his LSD and LDS mixed up?
   He still went on a trip only this one was to Brazil and
    lasted two years.

   Why didn't the BYU football team do as good this year?
   Every time they gained 10 yards, they had to give one back
   for tithing.

   How many RS ladies does it take to change a light bulb?
   Three. One to change the light bulb, two to serve refreshments!

   How many bishops does it take to change a light bulb?
   One, but the light bulb really has to want to change.
   
   If you're not LDS, you belong to a non-prophet organization.
   
   You might be a Mormon if...
      ...you make a toast with red punch at your wedding reception.
   
      ...you have more raw wheat stored in your basement than
         some Third World countries.
   
      ...you were an aunt or uncle before the age of 5.
   
      ...you have more children that you can find biblical names for.
   
      ...your family considers a trip to McDonalds a night out.
  
      ...you feel guilty when you watch Monday Night Football.
   
      ...your idea of a good time is playing Pictionary in the
         cultural hall.
   
      ...your idea of a wild party is a six-pack of Pepsi and a
         PG-13 movie.
   
      ...you and all of your friends come to your mom for a haircut
         in her kitchen.
   
      ...you think "You're a 10 cow wife" is a compliment.
   
      ...if you understand any of the above jokes.