"DRINK ME" potion "Humorous" T-shirt "I Love Me, Vol. I" 'Smuggler Shot First' Button 1/6th Pound Cake 11-inch knob sausage 3vi1 pr0n m4nic0tti A Beginner's Guide to Charming Snakes (used) a creased paper strip A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 1 (used) A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 2 (used) A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 3 (used) A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 4 (used) A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 5 (used) A Crimbo Carol, Ch. 6 (used) a crinkled paper strip a crumpled paper strip a cute angel a dance upon the palate a folded paper strip a ragged paper strip a ripped paper strip a rumpled paper strip a torn paper strip A. W. O. L. commendation abominable blubber adhesive tape dolly Admiral's hat adorable seal larva affordable teak perch Alewife™ Ale Alice's Army Alchemist Alice's Army booster box Alice's Army Bowman Alice's Army Cleric Alice's Army Coward Alice's Army Dervish Alice's Army Foil Alchemist Alice's Army Foil Bowman Alice's Army Foil Cleric Alice's Army Foil Coward Alice's Army Foil Dervish Alice's Army Foil Guard Alice's Army Foil Halberder Alice's Army Foil Hammerman Alice's Army Foil Horseman Alice's Army Foil Lanceman Alice's Army Foil Mad Bomber Alice's Army Foil Martyr Alice's Army Foil Ninja Alice's Army Foil Nurse Alice's Army Foil Page Alice's Army Foil Shieldmaiden Alice's Army Foil Sniper Alice's Army Foil Spearsman Alice's Army Foil Swordsman Alice's Army Foil tattoo Alice's Army Foil Wallman Alice's Army Guard Alice's Army Halberder Alice's Army Hammerman Alice's Army Horseman Alice's Army Lanceman Alice's Army Mad Bomber Alice's Army Martyr Alice's Army Ninja Alice's Army Nurse Alice's Army Page Alice's Army Shieldmaiden Alice's Army Sniper Alice's Army Spearsman Alice's Army Swordsman Alice's Army Wallman an evil little sump'm sump'm Angelhair Culottes anniversary balsa wood socks anniversary burlap belt anniversary safety glass vest Annual Ascot antique pair of blue jeans antique souvenir drawing archaeologing shovel Argarggagarg's fang arrowgram astral belt astral bludgeon astral bracer astral chapeau astral energy drink astral hot dog astral hot dog dinner astral longbow astral mace astral mask astral pet sweater astral pilsner astral pistol astral ring astral shield astral shirt astral shorts astral six-pack astral statuette astral trousers Atomic Comic Ax of L'rose bacon bath ball bad-ass club badass pie bag of bones baggie of powdered sugar ballast turtle Bandolier of the Spaghetti Elemental baneful bandolier bark beret bark boxers bark bracelet barrrnacle Bartles and BRAAAINS wine cooler Bash-Ōs boxtop Bash-Ōs cereal bath ball gift set beastly paste beautiful soup beer-scented teddy bear beer-soaked mop bejeweled cufflinks Ben-Gal™ Balm bewitching boots BGE 'cuddly critter' shirt BGE 'ferocious fruit' shirt BGE merchandise order form BGE pocket calendar BGE shotglass BGE temporary tattoo BGE tiny plastic toy big glob of skin big slimy cyst bindlestocking bird brain bishop cookie bite-me-red lipstick bitter bowtie bitter pill BitterSweetTarts black & tan Black Body™ spray black BRICKO brick black catseye marble black hymnal black pudding blackberry galoshes Bling of the New Wave Blood Light Blue Milk Club Card blue shell bone and arrows bone aperitif bone chips bone crusher bone meal bone spurs Bone's Farm "wine" boneana hammock bonedanna bonerang boning knife booze-soaked cherry bottle of agitprop ink bottle of Blank-Out bottle of Cochon Noir bottle of Gü-Gone bottle of Goldschnöckered bottle of moontan lotion boulder box of Familiar Jacks box of Pokëmann band-aids boxcar turtle boxing-glove-in-a-box BRAINS shorts brand new key brass crank handle brass dorsal fin brazen bracelet breaded beer Breathetastic™ Premium Canned Air BRICKO airship BRICKO bat BRICKO brick BRICKO bulwark BRICKO cathedral BRICKO egg BRICKO elephant BRICKO eye brick BRICKO gargantuchicken BRICKO hat BRICKO octopus BRICKO ooze BRICKO oyster BRICKO pants BRICKO pearl BRICKO pyramid BRICKO python BRICKO reactor BRICKO sword BRICKO trunk BRICKO turtle BRICKO vacuum cleaner broken BRICKO brick bronze handcuffs brown crock marble brown pixel bucket of honey bucket of wine bug paste bugged bön±Ã©t bugged balaclava bugged beanie Bulky Buddy Box bumblebee marble burst hellseal brain bus pass busted wings can of CRIMBCOLA can of depilatory cream can of Ghuol-B-Gone™ can of sterno can-you-dig-it? candy kneecapping stick candy knuckles candy necklace candy skeleton card sleeve cardboard elf ear carton of astral energy drinks caustic slime nodule cement sandals chainsaw chain chamoisole chaos popcorn charged magnet cheap plastic kazoo children of the candy corn chiptune guitar chlorophyll paste chocolate bath ball chocolate cigar chocolate disco ball chocolate pasta spoon chocolate saucepan chocolate seal-clubbing club chocolate stolen accordion chocolate turtle totem chocolate-covered caviar chocolate-covered scarab beetle chunk of cement Cinco Mayo Lager circular CRIMBCOOKIE Clan looking glass Clan pool table Clan shower Clan VIP Lounge invitation Clan VIP Lounge key Claw of the Infernal Seal club of corruption coal paperweight Cobb's Knob Menagerie key Cobb's Knob Wurstbrau coffee pixie stick Coily™ collapsible baton collection of tiny spooky objects colored-light "necklace" colorful plastic ball Comet Drop Comet Pop comfy pillow control crystal correction fluid corroded breeches corrosive cowl corrupt club of corrupt corruption corrupt club of corruption corrupted data cosmic paste cranberry schnapps Crazyleg's razor creepy voodoo doll creepy-ass club Crepes a la Lune CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 1) CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 1) (used) CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 2) CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 2) (used) CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 3) CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 3) (used) CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 4) CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 4) (used) CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 5) CRIMBCO Employee Handbook (chapter 5) (used) CRIMBCO lanyard CRIMBCO mug CRIMBCO scrip CRIMBCO wine CRIMBCOIDS mints CRIMBCOLOAF Crimbo candied pecan Crimbo Candy Cookbook Crimbo fudge Crimbo P. R. E. S. S. I. E. Crimbo paste Crimbo peppermint bark Crimbo wreath Crimbomination Contraption Crimbough Crimbuck croquet hedgehog crowbar Crown of Thrones crown-shaped beanie crusty hula hoop crystal orb of spirit wrangling crystallized memory cube of billiard chalk cult memo cupcake-in-a-cup cursed scrunchie cyber-mattock Das Überkühlraum trading card day-old beer dead lights pie decanter of fine Scotch decoded cult documents delicious comfit? deluxe fax machine demonic paste depleted uranium seal figurine Desert Bus pass designer handbag detour shield diabolical crossbow Dickory Farms Gift Basket distention pill dollar sign dolphin whistle double-ice box double-ice britches double-ice cap double-ice gum dragon snaps Dramatic™ range drum of pomade dubious peppermint dueling banjo dueling turtle Dungeon Fist gauntlet dusty animal cranium dusty animal jawbone dusty animal pelvis dusty animal skull dusty eighth caudal vertebra dusty eighth thoracic vertebra dusty eleventh thoracic vertebra dusty fifth caudal vertebra dusty fifth cervical vertebra dusty fifth lumbar vertebra dusty fifth thoracic vertebra dusty first caudal vertebra dusty first cervical vertebra dusty first lumbar vertebra dusty first thoracic vertebra dusty fourth caudal vertebra dusty fourth cervical vertebra dusty fourth lumbar vertebra dusty fourth thoracic vertebra dusty left clavicle dusty left eighth rib dusty left eleventh rib dusty left femur dusty left fibula dusty left fifth rib dusty left first front claw dusty left first rear claw dusty left first rib dusty left fourth front claw dusty left fourth rear claw dusty left fourth rib dusty left humerus dusty left kneecap dusty left ninth rib dusty left radius dusty left scapula dusty left second front claw dusty left second rear claw dusty left second rib dusty left seventh rib dusty left sixth rib dusty left tenth rib dusty left third front claw dusty left third rear claw dusty left third rib dusty left thumb dusty left tibia dusty left twelfth rib dusty left ulna dusty ninth caudal vertebra dusty ninth thoracic vertebra dusty right clavicle dusty right eighth rib dusty right eleventh rib dusty right femur dusty right fibula dusty right fifth rib dusty right first front claw dusty right first rear claw dusty right first rib dusty right fourth front claw dusty right fourth rear claw dusty right fourth rib dusty right humerus dusty right kneecap dusty right ninth rib dusty right radius dusty right scapula dusty right second front claw dusty right second rear claw dusty right second rib dusty right seventh rib dusty right sixth rib dusty right tenth rib dusty right third front claw dusty right third rear claw dusty right third rib dusty right thumb dusty right tibia dusty right twelfth rib dusty right ulna dusty sacral vertebrae dusty second caudal vertebra dusty second cervical vertebra dusty second lumbar vertebra dusty second thoracic vertebra dusty seventh caudal vertebra dusty seventh cervical vertebra dusty seventh lumbar vertebra dusty seventh thoracic vertebra dusty sixth caudal vertebra dusty sixth cervical vertebra dusty sixth lumbar vertebra dusty sixth thoracic vertebra dusty tenth caudal vertebra dusty tenth thoracic vertebra dusty third caudal vertebra dusty third cervical vertebra dusty third lumbar vertebra dusty third thoracic vertebra dusty twelfth thoracic vertebra dwarvish document dwarvish magazine dwarvish paper dwarvish parchment dwarvish punchcard dwarvish war helmet dwarvish war kilt dwarvish war mattock E-Z Cook™ oven E.M.U. harness E.M.U. helmet E.M.U. joystick E.M.U. rocket thrusters E.M.U. Unit Ecto-Cooler ectoplasmic paste eggman noodles El Vibrato Megadrone elderly jawbreaker electric crutch elemental paste elephant stinger elf resistance button Ellsbury's journal Ellsbury's journal (used) Ellsbury's skull elven limbos gingerbread elven cellocello elven hardtack elven magi-pack elven medi-pack elven squeeze elven suicide capsule Elvish delight empty agua de vida bottle encoded cult documents equal sign especially homoerotic frat-paddle essence of cold essence of cute essence of fright essence of heat essence of kink essence of stench essential cameraderie essential soy essential tofu Everlasting Deckswabber evil boring spaghetti evil delicious noodles evil delicious spicy noodles evil ducha de oro evil eye evil eyedrops of the ermine evil horizontal tango evil libation of liveliness evil noodles evil ointment of the occult evil painful penne pasta evil paper umbrella evil philter of phorce evil ravioli della hippy evil roll in the hay evil serum of sarcasm evil spicy noodles evil vihuela evil-ass club Evilometer exorcised sandwich expensive cigar expired bottle of peppermint schnapps expired can of franks 'n' beans extra-heavy BRICKO brick extra-potent gremlin mutagen extra-see-thru nightie extra-strength rubber bands extremely skinny jeans eye of the Tiger-lily facehugging alien fairy-worn boots Familiar-Gro™ Terrarium fancy beef jerky fancy black tie fancy canapés fancy chocolate car fancy opera glasses fancy tophat fancy tuxedo pants farfalle bow tie fat bottom quark fat loot token festive sausage Field Guide to Skeletal Anatomy Field Guide to Skeletal Anatomy (shredded) figurine of a charred seal figurine of a cold seal figurine of a cute baby seal figurine of a shadowy seal figurine of a sleek seal figurine of a slippery seal figurine of a stinking seal figurine of a wretched-looking seal figurine of an ancient seal figurine of an armored seal filet of tangy gnat ("fotelif") finger cuffs fish juice box fish-oil smoke bomb fisherman's sack fishy paste fistful of ashes fixed-gear bicycle Flail of the Seven Aspects flaming familiar doppelgänger flamingo mallet Flan in the Moon flimsy clipboard floaty gravel floaty inverse geode floaty pebbles floaty rock floaty rock helmet floaty rock necklace floaty rock pants floaty stone sphere flyest of shirts foreign box fossilized baboon skull fossilized bat skull fossilized demon skull fossilized limb fossilized necklace fossilized serpent skull fossilized spider skull fossilized spike fossilized spine fossilized torso fossilized wing fossilized wyrm skull fouet de tortue-dressage friendly cheez blob frigid hankyū frigid-ass club Frost™ brand sword frost-rimed seal hide frozen seal spine funhouse mirror funny paper hat fustulent seal grulch Galapagosian Cuisses Game Grid ticket Game Grid token Game Grid valued membership card garish pinky ring Garter of the Turtle Poacher gaudy key gauze hammock Genalen™ Bottle ghost protocol ghost trap ghostly body paint giant clay ashtray giant designer sunglasses giant diamond ring giant marshmallow gift-a-pult gilded BRICKO brick gilded BRICKO chalice gill rings gin-soaked blotter paper gingerbread house ginormous pumpkin glass of baboon milk glob of Blank-Out glowing frisbee glowstick on a string goblin autoblowgun goblin hunting spear goblin paste gold lamé pants golden plastic oyster egg golden ring Good 'n' Slimy gooey paste googly-ball hat googly-heart hat googly-star hat GOTO grappling hook grass clippings Gravyskin Belt of the Sauceblob greasy paste Great S-Cape Greatest American Pants green BRICKO brick green peawee marble Gregarious Gregorian Smock grinning turtle grisly shield grouper fangirl groupie bra groupie lipstick groupie spangles Grumpy Bumpkin's Pumpkin Seed Catalog guard turtle collar guard turtle shell Gummi-DNA gun cleaning kit hacienda key hair of the calf half-baked potion handful of headless bolts handful of honey handful of numbers handful of wires hardened slime belt hardened slime hat hardened slime pants Haunted Sorority House staff guide heart of the volcano heavy leather-bound tome hedgeturtle Heimandatz's heart hellseal brain hellseal claw hellseal disguise hellseal hide hellseal sinew hellseal whisker helm of the white knight herringcello hibernating robot reindeer hideous egg hilarious comedy prop hippo tutu hippy paste hobo paste Hodgman's journal #1: The Lean Times Hodgman's journal #2: Entrepreneurythmics Hodgman's journal #3: Pumping Tin Hodgman's journal #4: View From The Big Top holiday cheese log holiday log Hollandaise helmet holly-flavored Hob-O honey dipper honey mead honey stick honeybritches honeycap honeypot hopping socks hot-ass club huge pumpkin Humpty Dumplings hungover chauvinist pig hyperinflated seal lung ice skate decoy ice skate doll igloo pie imbued seal-blubber candle immense ballet shoes imp air incense bath ball indescribably horrible paste Indigo Party Invitation infant sandworm infernal toilet brush inflatable baseball bat ingot of seal-iron Inigo's Incantation of Inspiration Inigo's Incantation of Inspiration (crumpled) innuendo insane tophat Instant Karma intriguing puzzle box invisibility potion ironic moustache irresistibillity potion irritability potion Item #13 ittah bittah hookah ivory cue ball jabañero pepper jabañero-flavored chewing gum Jack-in-the-box jalapeño slices jar of "Creole Lady" marrrmalade jawbruiser Jawmaster 2000™ jet bennie marble jingle bell Jocko Homo's head Juju Mojo Mask king cookie kitty sheet music knight cookie Knob batter Knob cake Knob cake pan Knob frosting Knob Göblin lòve potion Knob Goblin deluxe scimitar Knob jelly donut Knob nuts KoL Con Cinco Piñata Bat KoL Con Six Pack Krakrox's Loincloth La Hebilla del Cinturón de Lopez LARP carp Lars the Cyberian lawn dart lawnmower blade leather aviator's cap leather bookmark Lederhosen of the Night left bracket left parenthesis leftover Crimbo rations lemon popsicle lemonade marble Li'l Businessman Kit Libram of BRICKOs licorice garrote lint little laminated card little parachute guy live lobster live wire liver and let pie liver popsicle Loathing Legion abacus Loathing Legion can opener Loathing Legion chainsaw Loathing Legion corkscrew Loathing Legion defibrillator Loathing Legion double prism Loathing Legion electric knife Loathing Legion flamethrower Loathing Legion hammer Loathing Legion helicopter Loathing Legion jackhammer Loathing Legion kitchen sink Loathing Legion knife Loathing Legion many-purpose hook Loathing Legion moondial Loathing Legion necktie Loathing Legion pizza stone Loathing Legion rollerblades Loathing Legion tape measure Loathing Legion tattoo needle Loathing Legion universal screwdriver Lobster qua Grill Lockenstock™ sandals lowercase a lump of coal lump of diamond lunar isotope macaroni duck machetito malevolent medallion mannequin leg map to Ellsbury's Claim map to Professor Jacking's laboratory Map to Safety Shelter Grimace Prime Map to Safety Shelter Ronald Prime map to the Kegger in the Woods map to The Landscaper's Lair map to the Magic Commune map to the Skate Park map to Vanya's Castle mariachi hat mariachi toothpaste marshmallow flambé Marvelous Unitard Massive Manual of Marauder Mockery meat shield meat st‰¿bing club Mecha Mayhem Club Card medium slimy cyst Mega Gem Meleegra™ pills memory of a C memory of a CA base pair memory of a CG base pair memory of a CT base pair memory of a cultist's robe memory of a G memory of a glowing crystal memory of a grappling hook memory of a GT base pair memory of a small stone block memory of a stone half-circle memory of a T memory of an A memory of an AG base pair memory of an AT base pair memory of half a stone circle memory of some delicious amino acids Mer-kin breastplate Mer-kin paste mermaid's purse Mesmereyes™ contact lenses Meteoid ice beam metrognome microwave stogie miniature pruning shears miniature tophat Mint-in-box Moonthril Circlet Mint-in-box Moonthril Cuirass Mint-in-box Moonthril Flamberge Mint-in-box Moonthril Greaves Mint-in-box Moonthril Longbow mirrored aviator shades misfit dolly misfit hobby horse misfit teddy bear missing wine moist sack mole molé molten medallion monster pants monstrous monocle Moon Pie moon unit Moonthril Circlet Moonthril Cuirass Moonthril Flamberge Moonthril Greaves Moonthril Longbow Moonthril Schnapps motivational poster moveable feast mulled cider multi-pass mummy costume musty moccasins My First Shaker™ My Own Pen Pal kit myrrh-soaked, chocolate-covered bacon bath ball mysterious chest mysterious present mysterious silver lapel pin nasty-ass club natto marble soda natto pocky natto-infused sake nauseating reagent necrotizing body spray nest egg neurostim pill Newbiesport™ backpack Newbiesport™ tent newborn kobold Newman's Own Trousers night-vision goggles Nightstalker perfume Northern pemmican notbig laminated card Notes from the Elfpocalypse, Chapter I Notes from the Elfpocalypse, Chapter II Notes from the Elfpocalypse, Chapter III Notes from the Elfpocalypse, Chapter IV Notes from the Elfpocalypse, Chapter V Notes from the Elfpocalypse, Chapter VI NPZR chemistry set Nuclear Blastball obnoxious riddle observational glasses oily paste Okee-Dokee soda old school Mafia knicke½æ old sweatpants old-school flying disc Operation Patriot Shield orange leather lanyard orange popsicle orc paste Oreille Divisée brandy organ grinder origami "gentlemen's" magazine orquette's phone number oven mitts overcookie overpriced "imported" beer oyster egg balloon pacifier necklace Pack of Alice's Army Cards Pack of Alice's Army Foil Cards packet of orchid seeds packet of pumpkin seeds padded tortoise Pain Dip paint bomb painted shield painted turtle pair of bolt cutters panicked kernel paperclip paperclip cape paperclip pants paperclip sproinger paperclip turban paperclip-on tie passable elf mask pawn cookie peanut brittle shield pebblebräu penguin focaccia bread penguin paste percent sign perfectly ordinary frog pernicious cudgel pet anemone pet rock "Groucho" disguise pet rock "Snooty" disguise petrified wood philosopher's scone photocopied monster physiostim pill Piddles pile of loose snow pin-stripe slacks pipe wrench piping organ pie pirate paste pixel chain whip pixel cross pixel holy water pixel morning star pixel orb pixel stopwatch pixel whip pixellated moneybag plain old beer plastic Crimbo reindeer plastic cup of beer plastic cup of flat beer plastic spider ring plastic vampire fangs PlexiPips plush alielf plush alien hamsterpus plush dogcat plush ferrelf plush hamsterpus plush mutated alielephant plush mutated alielf pocketwatch on a chain pointy red hat poison pen poisonous caviar Pokëmann band-aid Pokëmann figurine: Bloodkip Pokëmann figurine: Duck Pokëmann figurine: Frank Pokëmann figurine: Galumpagump Pokëmann figurine: Hoboking Pokëmann figurine: Kagosan Pokëmann figurine: Magikrap Pokëmann figurine: Moog Pokëmann figurine: Nothing Pokëmann figurine: Porkachu Pokëmann figurine: Shoggoth Pokëmann figurine: Smugleaf Pokëmann figurine: Twitter Pokëmann figurine: Vegemite Pokëmann figurine: Vermouth Polka Pop poodle skirt pool of liquid metal portable motorcycle portable photocopier potion of fishy speed pottery barn owl figurine powdered donut powdered sealbone powdered wig press-on ribs pressurized potion of pneumaticity pretty pink bow protein paste puff of smoke pumpkin pumpkin beer pumpkin bomb pumpkin carriage pumpkin juice pumpkin pie pumpkinhead mask puzzling ribbon puzzling trophy quadroculars quake of arrows quantum taco queen cookie Queue Du Coq cocktailcrafting kit raisin rat tooth polish reconstituted crow recording of Benetton's Medley of Diversity recording of Chorale of Companionship recording of Donho's Bubbly Ballad recording of Elron's Explosive Etude recording of Inigo's Incantation of Inspiration recording of Prelude of Precision recording of The Ballad of Richie Thingfinder red China marble Red Pill Red Rover BB gun red wagon red-and-green sweater red-hot medallion reflection of a map rehearsing dramatic hedgehog respected companion biscuit Retenez L'Herbe Paté ribbon candy rickety old unicycle right parenthesis robot reindeer protocol B.L.I.T.Z.E.N. robot reindeer protocol C.O.M.E.T. robot reindeer protocol C.U.P.I.D. robot reindeer protocol D.A.N.C.E.R. robot reindeer protocol D.A.S.H.E.R. robot reindeer protocol D.O.N.N.E.R. robot reindeer protocol O.L.I.V.E. robot reindeer protocol P.R.A.N.C.E.R. robot reindeer protocol R.U.D.O.L.P.H. robot reindeer protocol V.I.X.E.N. rock lobster rockfish stomach rocky road ice cream roller skate decoy roller skate doll rook cookie rubber band gun Ruby Rod Russian Ice rusty metal greaves rusty piece of rebar rxr shield s'more s'more gun S.A.V.E. flyer S.L.E.I.G.H.B.E.L.L.S. sack lunch Safari Jack's moustache Saison du Lune Salsa de las Epocas samurai turtle samurai turtle helmet Schmalz's First Prize Beer Schrödinger's thermos scissor duck scrap of shadow seal eyeball seal lube seal-blubber candle seal-brain elixir sealhide belt sealhide buckler sealhide cloak sealhide gloves sealhide hood sealhide leggings sealhide moccasins sealhide seal doll sealhide snare sealhide whip secret from the future secret tropical island volcano lair map security blankie Seeger's Unstoppable Banjo Seven Loco severed flipper shadowy seal eye shaking 4-d camera sham champagne shard of double-ice shin gourds shiny tribal beads shock belt shoo-fish pie shredded hellseal hide Silver Bullet beer silver cheese-slicer silver keg silver paté knife silver salt-shaker silver shotgun shell Single Alice's Army Foil sinister ancient tablet sinister demon mask six tiny wedges of goat cheese sizzling seal fat skate blade skate board skate skates skate skin Skullhead's Screw Sledgehammer of the Vælkyr sleep mask sleeping piano cat sleeping stocking sleeping wereturtle slime convention coupons slime convention flyers slime convention pin slime convention swag bag slime convention t-shirt slime stack slime-covered club slime-covered compass slime-covered greaves slime-covered helmet slime-covered lantern slime-covered necklace slime-covered shovel slime-covered speargun slime-soaked brain slime-soaked hypophysis slime-soaked sweat gland slimy alveolus slimy fermented bile bladder slimy paste slimy sweetbreads slippery when wet shield slow jam collection small laminated card small slimy cyst smiley-face sticker smiling rat smoked potsherd snailmail bits snailmail breeches snailmail coif snailmail hauberk snapdragon pistil snow belt snow halo snow hat snow pants snowball sock garters solid state loom Sorcerers of the Shore Grimoire sorority brain soup turtle soy cordial soyburger juice Sp'n-Zor's Grimoire of "Tasteful" Gifts space jam space jam toast Space Trip safety headphones space trooper helmet Spacefleet Communicator Badge spaghetti con calaveras spaghetti cult mask spaghetti cult robe spaghetti cult rosary Spaghetti with Moonballs spangly mariachi pants spangly mariachi vest spangly sombrero spangly unitard speed limit shield spiky turtle helmet spiky turtle shield spiky turtle shoulderpads spiraling shape sponge cake spooky bark spooky little girl Spooky Putty monster spooky sap squamous polyp square CRIMBCOOKIE squirming egg sac squirming Slime larva squirmy violent party snack Stabonic scroll Staff of Queso Escusado Staff of the Grand Flambé Staff of the November Jack-O-Lantern Staff of the Soupbone Staff of the Woodfire stapler bear Star of Bravery steely marble stick of "gum" stick-on mini solar panels sticky gloves stinky cheese ball stinky cheese diaper stinky cheese eye stinky cheese sword stinky cheese wheel stomach turnover stomp box stop shield strange cube strange paste strawberry popsicle stray chihuahua streetfighting champion's belt stress ball string of Crimbo lights string of dingle balls stuffed bandersnatch stuffed Baron von Ratsworth stuffed carpenter stuffed caterpillar stuffed crazy bastard sword stuffed dodo stuffed key stuffed martini stuffed Meat stuffed mink stuffed monocle stuffed pocketwatch stuffed porpoise stuffed teddy butler stuffed tin of caviar stuffed treasure chest stuffed walrus Subject 37 file sugar chapeau sugar shank sugar shard sugar sheet sugar shield sugar shillelagh sugar shirt sugar shorts sugar shotgun sun-dried tofu super-sweet boom box superduperball Supreme Being Glossary suspicious stocking Swabbie™ swab syncopated turtle synthetic dog hair pill TΤ◊lisman of Baiø‡ tainted seal's blood Tales of a Kansas Toymaker Tales of a Kansas Toymaker (used) tangle of rat tails Teachings of the Fist tempura air The Art of Slapfighting The Art of Slapfighting (used) The Autobiography Of Dynamite Superman Jones The Bomb The Cooler Out of Space the finger The Joy of Wassailing The Joy of Wassailing (used) The Landscaper's leafblower The Legendary Beat The Mariachi's guitar case The Necbromancer's Hat The Necbromancer's Shorts The Necbromancer's Stein The Necbromancer's Wizard Staff The Necbronomicon The Necbronomicon (used) The Trickster's Trikitixa thick padded envelope throbbing organ pie throwing bone throwing wrench Thwaitgold bee statuette Thwaitgold grasshopper statuette Tiger-lily's milk time's arrow tiny black hole tiny cell phone tiny fly glasses tiny frozen prehistoric meteorite jawbreaker tiny goth giant tiny plastic 11 Dealer tiny plastic Best Game Ever tiny plastic Crimbo Casino tiny plastic Crimbomination tiny plastic Don Crimbo tiny plastic fax machine tiny plastic hobo elf tiny plastic Mr. Mination tiny plastic stocking mimic tiny prop sword tiny slimy cyst tiny top hat and cane tobiko marble soda tobiko pocky tobiko-infused sake toe jam toe jam toast Tome of Clip Art Tome of Sugar Shummoning torn hellseal sinew torquoise torquoise ring tortoboggan tortoboggan shield traffic jam traffic jam toast transporter transponder tree-holed coin triangular CRIMBCOOKIE trousers of the white knight trout fang turtle soup turtle wax turtle wax greaves turtle wax helmet turtle wax shield turtlemail bits turtlemail breeches turtlemail coif turtlemail hauberk turtling rod Ultracolor™ shirt ultrafondue Ultrasoldier Serum unbearable light Uncle Crimbo's Sack Uncle Hobo's belt Uncle Hobo's epic beard Uncle Hobo's fingerless tinsel gloves Uncle Hobo's gift baggy pants Uncle Hobo's highest bough Uncle Hobo's stocking cap Uncle Romulus Uncle Romulus (used) underwater slingshot Underworld acorn Underworld flail Underworld sapling Underworld truncheon Underworld trunk undissolvable contact lenses unearthed potsherd unearthed volcanic meteoroid unfrosted Knob cake unlarge laminated card unspeakable lozenges untamable turtle unusual disco ball Ur-Donut urchin roe Van der Graaf helmet Vial of jus de larmes vial of amber slime vial of blue slime vial of brown slime vial of chartreuse slime vial of green slime vial of indigo slime vial of orange slime vial of purple slime vial of red slime vial of squid ink vial of teal slime vial of vermilion slime vial of violet slime vial of yellow slime Victor, the Insult Comic Hellhound Puppet villainous scythe Violet Hunt Invitation Volartta's bellbottoms volcanic ash Voluminous Radio Hat Voluminous Radio Pants Voluminous Radio Sneakers wad of cotton wad of slimy rags walrus ice cream wasabi marble soda wasabi pocky wasabi-infused sake waterlogged crate Wax Flask weremoose spit wet venom duct whalebone corset wheel whisker pencil White Hyborian wild honey pie willyweed Windsor Pan of the Source wok lobster wolfman mask Wolfman Nardz Workytime Tea world's most unappetizing beverage Wrath of the Capsaician Pastalords Wrecked Generator wrench handle wristwatch of the white knight wumpus hair wumpus-hair bolo wumpus-hair loincloth wumpus-hair net wumpus-hair sweater wumpus-hair whip wumpus-hair wig X-37 gun Yakisoba's hat Ye Wizard's Shack snack voucher yellow matter custard yield shield your own black heart zmobie Zu Mannkäse Dienen Zu Mannkäse Dienen (used)