See also: <a href="http://www.panix.com/~lan/exon">Exonerate</a>, the
answer to the Exon amendment.<hr>
<pre>
Newsgroups: alt.bbs.internet, alt.internet.services, panix.chat
Subject: Solution to Make.Money.Fast (and other net.crimes)...

OK...  I just got an idea-- anyone think we can combine an
ethernet card and a Whack-A-Mole machine to be used as pennance for
various net.crimes???  I can see it now...

panix: lan % finger @whack-a-luser.newbie.edu
[whack-a-luser.newbie.edu]

         Welcome to the Whack-a-Luser Punishment Server

Currently doing pennance:

   Login Name           Mole-Hole  WTD*    Time-Remaining  Crime
bkj1@delphi.com          mhs4       2312     3days, 5:30   MAKE.MONEY.FAST
levi@bu.edu              mhs6        654     6days, 6:21   MAKE.MONEY.FAST
Dick Depew               mhp3     103412     3years, 12d   ARMM.ARMM.ARMM.ARMM.
C.Thomas (no email!)     console   57231     7months, 2d   Jesus is Coming 

* == Whacks To Date.

---------

panix: lan % /etc/whack C.Thomas@whack-a-luser.newbie.edu
whack:  <WHOOSH>... <BONK!!!>... <OWWWW!>.

panix: lan % /etc/whack -s C.Thomas@whack-a-luser.newbie.edu
WHACK C.Thomas: x-tra large mallet
1 whack from panix.com (198.7.0.2): thunk_seq=0. pain_level=34.   <BONK!!>
1 whack from panix.com (198.7.0.2): thunk_seq=1. pain_level=12.   <BONK!!>
1 whack from panix.com (198.7.0.2): thunk_seq=2. pain_level=18.   <BONK!!>
1 whack from panix.com (198.7.0.2): thunk_seq=3. pain_level=16.   <BONK!!>
1 whack from panix.com (198.7.0.2): thunk_seq=5. pain_level=113.  <BONK!!>

...  [let run for a while] ...       >:-)

1 whack from panix.com (198.7.0.2): thunk_seq=225. pain_level=23  <BONK!!>
1 whack from panix.com (198.7.0.2): thunk_seq=226. pain_level=12  <BONK>
1 whack from panix.com (198.7.0.2): thunk_seq=227. pain_level=5   <BINK>
1 whack from panix.com (198.7.0.2): thunk_seq=228. pain_level=0   <THUD_SQUISH>
1 whack from panix.com (198.7.0.2): thunk_seq=229. pain_level=0   <SQUISH>
1 whack from panix.com (198.7.0.2): thunk_seq=230. pain_level=0   <SQUISH>
ICMP Head Unreachable from mallet.luser.com for impact.linear.noggin from
panix.com.  Error: skull has turned to thin paste.  Mount scratch luser.

panix: lan %

-----------

Anyone wanna write an RFC for a new IPTP (Internet Pain Transmission
Protocol)???  I'd write it but I've just been contracted to do some
hardware development for lorena@ginsu.com.  (If you finger this
machine, not only do we find out who you are, but we'll keep the
finger!)

--L

</pre>
<hr>

<h2>Green Eggs and Spam</h2><p>

<pre>

>From: lan@panix.com (Larry Nathanson)
>Newsgroups: news.admin.misc,panix.chat
>Subject: In memory of Dr. Suess.
>Date: 21 Apr 1994 15:22:27 -0400
>Organization: Foobar, Frobnitz and Mumble, Inc.
>Summary: The Earth has developed a slight eccentricity in it's orbit. The good Doctor S. spinning in his grave.

Dedicated to everyone's favorite pair of anti-social lawyers.

-------------------------------

I will not post ads to comp.lang.c
I will not post ads to comp.sys.hp

I will not post ads to comp.ai
I will not post ads to alt.ensign.wesley.die.die.die

I will not post ads to talk.bizarre
I will not post ads to rec.audio.car

I will not post ads to alt.comics.batman
I will not post them, Spam I am.


I will not post ads to alt.illuminati
I will not post ads to alt.religion.kibology

I will not post ads to news.admin.misc
I will not post ads to comp.ivideodisc

I will not post ads to alt.sex.bondage
I will not post ads to alt.folklore.college

I will not post ads to comp.lang.fortran
I will not post them, Spam I am.

--L

</pre>