{"id":199770,"date":"2007-06-27T21:48:00","date_gmt":"2007-06-28T02:48:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.panix.com\/~msaroff\/40years\/2007\/06\/27\/for-the-record-ive-never-been-this-drunk\/"},"modified":"2007-06-27T21:48:00","modified_gmt":"2007-06-28T02:48:00","slug":"for-the-record-ive-never-been-this-drunk","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.panix.com\/~msaroff\/40years\/2007\/06\/27\/for-the-record-ive-never-been-this-drunk\/","title":{"rendered":"For the Record, I&#8217;ve Never Been THIS Drunk"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Damn, that&#8217;s the 2nd drunkest that I&#8217;ve ever heard of.<\/p>\n<blockquote style=\"color: rgb(0, 0, 153);\"><p><span style=\"font-size:130%;\"><a style=\"font-weight: bold;\" href=\"http:\/\/www.islandpacket.com\/news\/local\/story\/6564932p-5843463c.html\">Man mistakes straw bale for stricken woman, gives it CPR<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n<p>By Daniel Brownstein<\/p>\n<p>A Hilton Head Island man confused bales of pine straw with a dead woman, and tried to resuscitate them early Tuesday morning, according to a sheriff&#8217;s report.<\/p>\n<p>The 39-year-old called deputies to the parking lot of Hilton Head Cabanas, 32 South Forest Beach Drive, at 1:49 a.m., saying he had just tried to perform CPR on a dead woman, according to the sheriff&#8217;s report.<\/p>\n<p>They arrived to find him talking to a large bale of pine straw.<\/p>\n<p>When asked where the woman was, he pointed to the straw, the report stated.<\/p>\n<p>&#8230;..<\/p><\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Damn, that&#8217;s the 2nd drunkest that I&#8217;ve ever heard of. Man mistakes straw bale for stricken woman, gives it CPR By Daniel Brownstein A Hilton Head Island man confused bales of pine straw with a dead woman, and tried to resuscitate them early Tuesday morning, according to a sheriff&#8217;s report. The 39-year-old called deputies to &hellip;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[962,1015],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-199770","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-40yrs","category-weird"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.panix.com\/~msaroff\/40years\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/199770"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.panix.com\/~msaroff\/40years\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.panix.com\/~msaroff\/40years\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.panix.com\/~msaroff\/40years\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.panix.com\/~msaroff\/40years\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=199770"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.panix.com\/~msaroff\/40years\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/199770\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.panix.com\/~msaroff\/40years\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=199770"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.panix.com\/~msaroff\/40years\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=199770"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.panix.com\/~msaroff\/40years\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=199770"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}