DOWN (Dining Out With Nerds) report: Star Wars: The Clone Wars

I saw this movie by myself after everyone warned me not to. But I’d missed a lot of movies in the past two months, and this was the only one before 10pm, so I went to see it anyway.

It’s important to approach this movie the right way. A lot of people really hated this movie, but I (moderately) disagree. It is a movie for kids, and it’s the lead-in to an animated TV series for kids. As such, you get what that implies, and it ain’t gonna be Shakespeare.

The plot was simpler than the regular Star Wars movies. Basically, it’s a single incident from the war between the “Separatists” (I guess terms like “reactionary imperialists” weren’t acceptable) and the Republic, and it depends on Jabba the Hutt being remarkably stupid. The animation is decent but not outstanding; Lucas was partly emulating Thunderbirds instead of, say, Shrek. It has a new character, Ahsoka, a 14-year-old female apprentice Jedi; she is the padawan (student) of Anakin Skywalker. She’s tough and effective and cute, and obviously a role model to draw in a young female audience.

The movie really tries to faithfully mirror the Big Six. The CGI cityscapes were dramatic but simpler than in some of the other movies, which sometimes were so full and cluttered that they were hard to comprehend. There’s lots of action. The mandatory massed armies charging each other in the open were unbelievable as always, but the vertical attack up a giant cliff was gripping. The usual heroes and villains appear, the dialogue and acting are respectively simple and wooden, just like always.

Lucas’ somewhat geeky sense of humor is still in the movie, but toned down and simplified for the kids. I was amused when Ziro the Hutt shouted “Run away!” and shuffled his several-hundred-pound legless bulk towards the door. The banter between Skywalker and Ahsoka is mildly amusing (“Sky Guy” and “Snips”), but it goes on too long and the relationship only barely evolves. They do find a bit of respect for each other but that’s as far as it goes.

One difference is that we know the future. The Republic is fated to fall, Skywalker is doomed to Darthness, but the characters here don’t know that and courageously battle on. It added a bit of darkness to my mood, but the movie simply ignores that.

Reviews on imdb.com were split. Many people simply hated the movie and considered it outright treason to all things Star Wars. Many found it reasonable when accepted on its own terms. I enjoyed it for what it is, and won’t complain that it failed at something it wasn’t trying to be. But it doesn’t try to be much.

[Back to reviews page]