Category: Religion

They No Play-a daGame, They No Make-a da Rules*

So, in order to pacify the U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops which has been completely captured by the right-wing and hostile to Democrats for something approaching two decades, the House has agreed to a allow an amendment to be voted that would effectively ban all health insurance policies that pay for abortion services:

Under the agreement, anti-abortion Democrats will be permitted to offer an amendment on the House floor to the health-care overhaul bill. The amendment would prohibit a new government-run insurance plan created by the health-care bill from offering to cover abortion services, congressional sources said. It would also block people who received federal subsidies for the purchase of health insurance from buying policies that offered coverage for abortions.

No doubt about this: by excluding these plans, it will cause their extinction, because it effectively bans such plans from the new insurance exchanges.

I think that the House Leadership should have told Bart Stupak (D-Vatican) to go Cheney himself, and perhaps a fuller application of criminal conspiracy laws, against people like, for example, U.S. Conference of Catholic Bishops, who actively conspired to conceal child abuse by clergy is in order too.

[update]

That piece of sh$# amendment passes, 240-194, a little bit after 10:00pm.

*I’m paraphrasing Nixon administration Secretary of Agriculture, and notable bigot, Earl Butz, and yes, I can understand how it’s potentially offensive, but far less offensive than members of the clergy attempting to dictate policy.

Where is Your God Now?

On my most recent bank failure Friday post, there was a small bank in Otsego, MN, Riverview Community Bank that was closed by regulators.

Well, it turns out that the story of this bank is just a bit weirder than your average bank failure.

Riverview Community Bank was run by a religious nutcase who attempted to foist his religious views on his employees:

Riverview Community Bank, an Otsego firm that attracted national media attention several years ago for espousing prayer in the workplace, has been shut down by state regulators.



Early in its life, Riverview had a reputation for mixing faith and finance. Chuck Ripka, one of the bank’s founders, once told the Star Tribune that God spoke to him and said, “Chuck, if you pastor the bank, I’ll take care of the bottom line.” Ripka and his staff would pray with customers in the bank’s Otsego branch and even at the drive-up window. In a 2004 New York Times story, Ripka said he occasionally slipped up and said, “Come on over to the church — I mean the bank.”

Of course, this makes his bank hostile to non-Christian, or for that matter, non-obnoxious Christian, and as a public accommodation it also makes it hostile to non-Christian, or for that matter, non-obnoxious Christian, customers.

Yes, a religious test on employment is illegal, and it’s pretty clear that this guy made it clear that non-Christian, or for that matter, non-obnoxious Christian, people need not apply for jobs.

There is also the whole “Chasing the money changers from the temple,” irony thing, but I’m not up on my Christian mythology enough to follow the finer points.

It is worth noting that the bank was the subject of consent enforcement actions in the year before its closing, and were instructed to stop paying dividends when they were always circling the drain.

There is a lesson in all this, though: If you believe that God is on your side, you are always wrong, but if you worry whether or not you are on God’s side, you have a possibility of being right.

There is something deeply disturbing and deeply hypocritical about all these folks who seem to think that Christianity is nothing more than a path to wealth.

Pissing On Antonin Scalia’s Grave

PZ Myers notes on his Pharyngula blog that Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia is an incompetent hypocrite, which is not a tough call.

In this case, it was during arguments in Buono v. Salazar, during which Fat Tony basically said that everyone uses crosses to memorialize the dead, and when the counsel for the ACLU Peter Eliasberg notes that you won’t find crosses in Jewish cemeteries, Scalia finds it, “an outrageous conclusion,” that people would consider the symbol of Christianity to be….Well …. Christian.

Well, Dr. Meyers has a suggestion, which I endorse with one caveat:

Since Scalia is such an open-minded syncretist, I suggest that when he dies, right after all the partying and celebration, we atheists pass around a hat and get a collection going to erect a huge Muslim crescent over his grave. Not only will it honor the dead man, but it’ll let us do double-duty when we all line up to piss on it. Everyone wins!

My only request is that he be buried near enough to Ayn Rand that I do not need 2 beers to “show my respects” to both of them.

If You Want to Have an Opinion On Spending, Pay Some Damn Taxes

So, the Conference of Catholic Bishops is saying that it would be , since they don’t like them, but somehow or other they don’t say a single word on the millions of dollars spent every year on capital punishment that the Pope also says is immoral, or the bank bailout, when the Pope condemns the excesses of capitalism, or the fact that our current system of healthcare victimizes the weak and helpless and kills them.

How about calming down, and drinking a nice warm glass of shut the F%$# up?

Republican Jesus Lives

Just when you thought that the politicization of religion could not get any more despicable, we find that right wingers have decided to rewrite the bible in order to excise all those liberal bits:

  1. Framework against Liberal Bias: providing a strong framework that enables a thought-for-thought translation without corruption by liberal bias
  2. Not Emasculated: avoiding unisex, “gender inclusive” language, and other modern emasculation of Christianity
  3. Not Dumbed Down: not dumbing down the reading level, or diluting the intellectual force and logic of Christianity; the NIV is written at only the 7th grade level
  4. Utilize Powerful Conservative Terms: using powerful new conservative terms as they develop; defective translations use the word “comrade” three times as often as “volunteer”; similarly, updating words which have a change in meaning, such as “word”, “peace”, and “miracle”.
  5. Combat Harmful Addiction: combating addiction by using modern terms for it, such as “gamble” rather than “cast lots”; using modern political terms, such as “register” rather than “enroll” for the census
  6. Accept the Logic of Hell: applying logic with its full force and effect, as in not denying or downplaying the very real existence of Hell or the Devil.
  7. Express Free Market Parables; explaining the numerous economic parables with their full free-market meaning
  8. Exclude Later-Inserted Liberal Passages: excluding the later-inserted liberal passages that are not authentic, such as the adulteress story
  9. Credit Open-Mindedness of Disciples: crediting open-mindedness, often found in youngsters like the eyewitnesses Mark and John, the authors of two of the Gospels
  10. Prefer Conciseness over Liberal Wordiness: preferring conciseness to the liberal style of high word-to-substance ratio; avoid compound negatives and unnecessary ambiguities; prefer concise, consistent use of the word “Lord” rather than “Jehovah” or “Yahweh” or “Lord God.”

No, this is not a joke, it’s right from the Conservapedia page (no link, it only feeds the delusions)

It is not April Fools Day, nor is it Adar,* and it is not The Onion. This is real.

You know, I believe that it would appropriate at this time for some people to be struck by lightning, or at least to get some damn psychotropic medications, the really strong stuff, because this is nuts, in addition to being laughable, and, of course blasphemous.

I support the right to blaspheme, but I really think it’s a bad idea to call him a c%$#sucker, which is what this is.

I really can’t add anything to the General’s Republican Jesus, so just go to his site, and buy his stuff, but don’t read his site when you are drinking anything, or you will need a screen cleaner.

*The month of Adar in the Hebrew calendar. It is associated with Purim, and is the preferred time for practical jokes.

Ummmmm…Not So Fast

It appears that the Telegraph in the UK has reported that Mahmoud Ahmadinejad’s family converted from Judaism to Islam and changed their name when he was 4 years old, largely on the basis of the change in family name from Sabourjian.

The problem is that this is simply untrue, according to the Guardian.

First, the Telegraph says:

  • That “Sabour” is the word for Talit used by Iranian Jews.
    • Not true: it means “thread painter”, and refers to those who work coloring fibers for Persian carpets.
      • Note that thread painting is not a traditionally Jewish profession in Iran.
    • The word used by Iranian Jews for the Tallit is “Tallit” (my experience with Iranian coreligionists) or Titzit (19th Century Iranian Judaism Scholar David Yeroshalm), both Hebrew words from scripture.
    • According to scholars, there is no word Sabour at all among Jewish dialects in Iran.
  • That “Jian” is a suffix that almost exclusively refers to practicing Jews.
    • Simply untrue. It’s a fairly common suffix.

What is true, however, is that surnames have come fairly recently to Iran, and that the “hicks in the sticks”, typically had surnames associated with the family profession, like “thread painter”:

The reason that Ahmadinejad’s father changed his surname has more to do with the class struggle in Iran. When it became mandatory to adopt surnames, many people from rural areas chose names that represented their professions or that of their ancestors. This made them easily identifiable as townfolk. In many cases they changed their surnames upon moving to Tehran, in order to avoid snobbery and discrimination from residents of the capital.

The Sabourjians were one of many such families. Their surname was related to carpet-making, an industry that conjures up images of sweatshops. They changed it to Ahmadinejad in order to help them fit in. The new name was also chosen because it means from the race of Ahmad, one of the names given to Muhammad.

But wait, there’s more:

Moreover, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad’s mother is a Seyyede. This is a title given to women whose family are believed to be direct bloodline descendants of Prophet Muhammad. Male members are given the title of Seyyed, and include prominent figures such as Iran’s supreme leader Ali Khamenei. In Judaism, this is equivalent to the Cohens, who are direct descendants of Aaron, the brother of Moses. One has to be born into a Seyyed family: the title is never given to Muslims by birth, let alone converts. This makes it impossible for Ahmadinejad’s mother to have been a Jew. In fact, she was so proud of her lineage that everyone in her native village of Aradan referred to her by her Islamic title, Seyyede.

So, even if his father, or his father’s family were Jewish, he would not be, because Judaism is matrilineal, and if your mother is not Jewish, you are not Jewish, except by formal conversion.

Of course, I am competing with two links from two papers, the Telegraph, and the The Grauniad*, so why am I taking the side of the latter?

It’s pretty simple really: First, I have had Iranian Jewish friends, and the phrase “Sabour” never came up, and we did talk about Tallit in shul, and second, because the source was a newspaper formerly owned by Conrad Black, before he was sent off to a very well deserved stint in jail, and every story from a news outlet formerly owned by Conrad Black should be viewed with a jaundiced eye.

Additionally, you will note that that the Telegraph provides no on the record sources for its analysis, while the Grauniad* does, and goes into some detail as to the background of these sources.

*According to the Wiki, The Guardian, formerly the Manchester Guardian in the UK. It’s nicknamed the Grauniad because of its penchant for typographical errors, “The nickname The Grauniad for the paper originated with the satirical magazine Private Eye. It came about because of its reputation for frequent and sometimes unintentionally amusing typographical errors, hence the popular myth that the paper once misspelled its own name on the page one masthead as The Gaurdian, though many recall the more inventive The Grauniad.”

Went to the Burial at Arlington National Cemetery

For my neighbor, MSgt Wade. (Note first name, not last, I’m not blogging that out of respect for his privacy)

As with any institution, it is end of life where the where the ritual becomes its most elaborate and intricate, and I think that the sense that it gives the loved ones of their place in the continuum of society and culture is a good thing.

The rigidly at attention honor guard, the flags and their folding, the firing of a salute, and the bugler playing taps all serve to show the loved ones of the deceased that they are a part of something bigger.

That being said, when the honor guard fired their weapons (bolt action Springfields, I think, they were manually working an action), my son, who hates loud noises, he’s an Aspie, and this is symptomatic of being on the spectrum, jumped and covered his ears.

Wednesday is International Blasphemy Day

I have post-posted this, so that it will stay at the top of the page through September 30, so scroll down my other posts.

Some bloke has declared September 30 to be International Blasphemy Day.

While I am generally leery of the many special days that have been announced, except, of course for “Talk Like a Pirate Day,” the basic thesis here is a sound one:

Blaspheming the sacred is an obligation that every logical person must embrace. Like we all learned from Spiderman’s uncle, “With great power comes great responsibility”, and when your mind has evolved to a degree where you are granted an advanced understanding of logic and reason, you realize that the natural laws of the universe have given you a great power.

It is your responsibility as a logical person to shed light on the darkness of ignorance wherever it may be. Nothing must be left in the dark. No corner of this universe can be left alone from wanting to know.

There can be nothing sacred. Because the entire concept behind “sacred ideas” is that they are “off limits”. It is something that you are not allowed to question, or speak out against, or even think. There’s another term that fits this concept perfectly… “thought crime”.

I agree, and I agree with his post condemning Ireland’s blasphemy laws.

Going back to the home page of the administrator, this guy is generally anti-religious, as opposed to specifically anti-Islamic.

By the way, were most of the founding fathers, who loathed organized religion, even if they were spiritual.

Another Reminder on My Ad Policy

I saw an ad on my site from Scientology.

I do not review ads to see if they match my opinions.

In the case of Scientology, it does not. I am a Jew, not a Scientologist.

This would apply to any other religion.

In addition the Church of Scientology (CoS) has a very long history of threats and intimidation against critics which I find abhorrent, and L. Ron Hubbard’s Battlefield Earth books really suck.

So, if you see the ad, this does not reflect an endorsement on my part.

I May Not Be Fasting on Yom Kippur

Because that pig felching junkie and drunk Glenn Beck has decided to announce that he wants to use September 28th this is a day of fasting and prayers for conservatives, and that is also the daytime portion of Yom Kippur, the Jewish day of atonement.

My guess is that this a cunning plan for him to claim that “millions were fasting,” because we do that every year.

I have no health issues that would prevent me from fasting.

In fact, giving my gut a 25 hour rest is actually pretty good for me, settles everything down, but I think that there must be something in Halacha* that prohibits even the appearance of listening to that bigoted repugnant moran.

H/t Old Pinko.

*Jewish religious law

Went to a Funeral

I went to MSgt Wade’s funeral this afternoon.

Wade led a life in which he made many friends, and helped a lot of people, and made even more people laugh. As his son noted, in the most positive way possible, he was a “goofy bastard,” and a lot of that was because of his sense of deep abiding honesty.

He was a military Chinese linguist, and among other things, lobbied the chain of command or immersion training to be a part of military foreign language training. (Which it now is)

He is also the one who told me that the name I gave one of my cats, Tudza, not only meant “Rabbit,” but was also Chinese slang for gay, which might explain why my fixed since age one cat has a serious catnip problem. (Not really, if cats cared about their names, they would come when called).

One thing that I still have a problem with in non-Jewish funerals is the open casket bit.

I’ve been to about a dozen funerals, with about ¾ being Jewish, and hence closed casket, and I still don’t get the open casket funeral. It gives me the serious willies.

I Guess That They Are Morally Superior

Stephen is on the left, Melina is on the Right

The former assistant dean at Pat Robertson’s Regent University, formerly CBN University, and his wife, Stephen and Melina Mcpherson, pled guilty to sexually abusing three teenage sisters at Hope Haven Children’s Home.

Court records show the McPhersons manipulated the teens into submitting to fondling, kissing and other sex acts. They cited Bible verses that they said justified the abuse and, afterward, would pray together for God’s forgiveness.

It gets better, because he has already pled guilty to forcible sodomy and object sexual penetration on two of the girls.

I guess that the members of the religious right are just better than the rest of us.

Seriously, Tartuffe looks less and less like a comedy every day.

H/t Pam’s House Blend.

Our Dumb Nation

So, a band came up with T-shirt, “Brass Evolutions, 2009,” but some creationist whack job parents objected so the assistant superintendent confiscated the shirts, because some parents, “don’t think evolution should be associated with our school.”

Since when did stupid people get the right to make the rest of us stupid?

What the administration should have done was contact the alma mater of said parents, and suggest that their diplomas be revoked.

Talking to God Does Not Make You Crazy

But when you hear him answering back, in complete sentences, and he is saying, “Michelle Bachmann, you should run for President….Well, yes, that is batsh%$ insane.

To be fair, Michelle Bachmann is not claiming that God told her to run for President, though she did say that God told her to run for Congress, she’s just saying that she expects God to ask her to run for president.

“The phrase ‘paranoid schizophrenic with delusions of grandeur’ is not in the aardvark’s vocabulary, so, in his mind, he substitutes ‘crazy as a panrovian monk’ . . . ” (Cerebus #5 p 13)

I feel embarrassment sharing a country with her….How do her constituents not go through life with bags over their heads to conceal their identities.

Jesus Was Best Man at a Gay Wedding

Seriously, this is a part of early Christian mythology:

A Kiev art museum contains a curious icon from St. Catherine’s Monastery on Mt. Sinai in Israel. It shows two robed Christian saints. Between them is a traditional Roman ‘pronubus’ (a best man), overseeing a wedding. The pronubus is Christ. The married couple are both men.

Is the icon suggesting that a gay “wedding” is being sanctified by Christ himself? The idea seems shocking. But the full answer comes from other early Christian sources about the two men featured in the icon, St. Sergius and St. Bacchus, two Roman soldiers who were Christian martyrs. These two officers in the Roman army incurred the anger of Emperor Maximian when they were exposed as ‘secret Christians’ by refusing to enter a pagan temple. Both were sent to Syria circa 303 CE where Bacchus is thought to have died while being flogged. Sergius survived torture but was later beheaded. Legend says that Bacchus appeared to the dying Sergius as an angel, telling him to be brave because they would soon be reunited in heaven.

….

Prof. John Boswell, the late Chairman of Yale University’s history department, discovered that in addition to heterosexual marriage ceremonies in ancient Christian church liturgical documents, there were also ceremonies called the “Office of Same-Sex Union” (10th and 11th century), and the “Order for Uniting Two Men” (11th and 12th century).

So much for “traditional” marriage.

What the Christofascist jihad against gay marriage is really about is that some (far too many) people need to use religion to excuse their hate, and that gays, and gay marriage, are simply the latest target for their “5 minutes of hate.”

So, Who is Representative Heath Shuler (D-NC) F%$#ing?

Because it appears that he lives at the C Street complex too.

Considering the fact that it increasingly appears that the primary purpose of this residence is to allow philandering Congressman to collude to conceal the fact, it’s become a much less popular place to lose.

At the very least he’s refusing to explicitly deny that this is where he lives, and if he weren’t living there, he’d be categorically denying.

You know it was much easier answering the question, “W is Heath Shuler f%$#ing?,” when he was an overpriced underperforming rookie for the Washington Redskins.

When that was going on, we knew who was being f%#$ed: the fans, who at the end of the day were the ones who supplied the money to pay his salary.

Yeah, I’m still a bit bitter about it.