Category: Reviews

Best First Paragraph of a Book Review Ever

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When you read this, you know that you are in for one hell of a ride:

I was hired as an assassin. You don’t bring in a 37-year-old woman to review John Updike in the year of our Lord 2019 unless you’re hoping to see blood on the ceiling. ‘Absolutely not,’ I said when first approached, because I knew I would try to read everything, and fail, and spend days trying to write an adequate description of his nostrils, and all I would be left with after months of standing tiptoe on the balance beam of objectivity and fair assessment would be a letter to the editor from some guy named Norbert accusing me of cutting off a great man’s dong in print. But then the editors cornered me drunk at a party, and here we are.

—Patricia Lockwood in London Review of Books

Just in case you are wondering, while many admire the author’s prose, it also considered to be extremely misogynistic by many.

H/t Naked Capitalism for finding this 2019 gem.

Must Get This Book

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I just read a review of Virtue Hoarders: The Case against the Professional Managerial Class, and the book sounds like a real barn-burner:

Who are the members of the professional managerial class? Neither capitalists nor workers, one strains to define them in purely economic terms. If you have ever dealt with members of the PMC, the first word that comes to mind is annoying. It might be part of a slightly larger summation of annoying and pretentious. But annoying is always going to make the cut because members of the PMC are not just managers by vocation, but also by personality. They love to regulate and micromanage: their subordinates, their children, and even themselves.

Is it due to nature or nature? Occupational hazard or innate insufferableness? No one really knows for sure. What is known is that these are the most annoying people on the planet. People who get positively aroused at the idea of telling you what to do, correcting you, and telling you that they just read an article in The New York Times about just that issue and now have something old to say in a new way. A day without them giving out a did you know factoid is like a day without sunshine. The type of people who can only have an orgasm if they see someone getting a parking ticket.

Catherine Liu lives among these people and seems rather fed up. Her new book Virtue Hoarders: The Case against the Professional Managerial Class makes it crystal clear that she is having a lot of passive-aggressive lunch meetings with other members of the University of California, Irvine faculty.

(emphasis mine)

That line made me laugh.

………

However, Liu focuses on another way the PMC mask their will to power: moral preening. She claims the professional managerial class hoards virtue for itself as part of its war against the working class. Which is to say, Liu recognizes that the PMC and the working class are, in fact, class enemies.

Building on the work of Barbara Ehrenreich, she accepts that the PMC at one time played a positive role in society by challenging the barbarity of earlier iterations of capitalism; specifically when members of the PMC were advocates for creating professional standards in fields like medicine and social research, and were advocating for welfare state economic reforms. But as the post-World War 2 capitalist settlement soured and neoliberalism became ascendant, Liu claims “the PMC preferred to fight culture wars against the classes below while currying favor with the capitalists it once despised.”

This was not a moral awakening, but an awokening. A power play by the PMC to secure their class position within the capitalist system using the lofty language of social justice to defend basic material interest.

I also call them Hillary Clinton voters.

………

The main argument of the book, or so it seems to me, is that the professional managerial class of present is actively working against building socialism in the United States. That the PMC could really be considered the prime obstacle to unifying the working class as they continually divide working people along the rigid lines of identity to serve their own class interests:

[The PMC] prefers obscurantism, balkanization, and management of interest groups to a transformative reimagining of the social order. It wants to play the virtuous social hero, but as a class, it is hopelessly reactionary. The interests of the PMC are now tied more than ever to its corporate overlords than to the struggles of the majority of Americans whose suffering is merely background decor for the PMC’s elite volunteerism. Members of the PMC soften the sharpness of their guilt about collective suffering by stroking their credentials and telling themselves that they are better and more qualified to lead and guide than other people.

Looks like someone just got herself uninvited to an 80s party.

What the review, and probably the book, do not address is how so much of this is driven by what the late Dave Graeber called Bullsh%$ Jobs.

I would argue that much of the dysfunction described in this review is an artifact of what Graeber described as the, “profound psychological violence,” of having a career that one knows on some level has no value.

Charlie Played the Lead in Little Shop of Horrors Tonight

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He played Seymour Krelborn.

He did a very good job, and his portrayal was remarkably dark, at least as compared to my recollections of the original Broadway show that I saw many decades ago.

He mentioned to me that he was channeling his middle school experiences, and I saw that.

He and Natalie clearly got their singing voices from my mom, because neither my wife or I can carry a tune.

According to the Customs of My People, Chinese and a Movie on Christmas

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Star Wars: The Force Awakens

Cast:
Harrison Ford … Han Solo
Mark Hamill … Luke Skywalker
Carrie Fisher … Princess Leia
Adam Driver … Kylo Ren
Daisy Ridley … Rey
John Boyega … Finn
Oscar Isaac … Poe Dameron 

Director: 
J.J Abrams

This is a spoiler free review, so I will not go into the minutae of the plot.

I think that J.J Abrams did a thoroughly competent job in this movie.

As my son said, no one is going to call J.J. Abrams “Jar Jar Abrams” after this.

It was worth watching in a movie theater.

That being said, I was not as impressed as my wife and kids were.

The original Star Wars was very consciously following anthropologist’s Joseph Campbell’s Hero’s Journey.

George Lucas has been very explicit about this.

The nickel tour of the Hero’s Journey is:
1. Ordinary World
2. Call To Adventure
3. Refusal Of The Call
4. Meeting The Mentor
5. Crossing The Threshold
6. Tests, Allies, Enemies
7. Approach To The Inmost Cave
8. Ordeal
9. Reward (Seizing The Sword)
10. The Road Back
11. Resurrection
12. Return With The Elixir

Campbell posits that this is at the core of most, if not all, hero stories and myths.

I don’t think that J.J. Abrams did this. I think that he was looking at doing Star Wars.

I got the sense in a number of scenes that Abrams was marking the checklist. I found it a bit distracting and I found the film derivative.

As to the performances, I thought that Harrison Ford was more playing Harrison Ford than Han Solo, Carrie Fisher was a clenching her jaws throughout her performance a bit too much .

As to the newcomers, both Ridley and Boyega did well.  Neither of them were overawed by the shoes that they had to fill.

They were both fun to watch, particularly Boyega, who has a flair for playing a flawed character finding himself.

Oscar Isaac’s performance was good, but basically he was just playing the eye candy hotshot pilot.  It was kind of a throw away role.

That being said, of the 5 Star Wars movies that I’ve seen, I’ve not seen the Phantom Menace or Attack of the Clones, it is firmly in 3rd, behind the original and The Empire Strikes Back, and well ahead of Return of the Jedi (I hate Ewoks) and Revenge of the Sith (I hate Hayden Christenson even more than I hate Ewoks)

I would give it 3½ out of 5 stars, but as I noted, my wife and kids all thought that it was the best thing since light saber sliced bread.

Minor Freakout at the Saroff Household

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It was a good one.

I was channel surfing, and saw that The Princess Bride was about to start on one of the cable channels.

Neither of the Saroff children had ever seen this film in its entirety, so I ran around like my hair was on fire getting them down to the TV.

We also made grilled cheese sandwiches and from-scratch tomato basil soup (this started before I saw the movie).

They enjoyed the film immensely. For them not to do would be ……… Inconceivable!!!

I expect to hear quotes from the film incessantly for the next few weeks.

Something is Wrong on the Internet

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As you are no doubt aware, the film Guardians of the Galaxy opened this weekend.

As the archetypal summer blockbuster, it got a lot of reviews, and one, at the Village Voice, Stephanie Zacharek, was less than charitable, which resulted in a torrent of sexist abuse directed her way:

“She’s just pissed because she lives in the Village full of gay men and no one wants any of her old, dried out pie.”

………

 “We live in a world where 1000s of people are being beheaded and murdered throughout the world each and every day and this harlot has the nerve to knock it because it’s too fun?”

Harlot? Seriously?

“She should stick to reviewing chick flicks only.”

What is wrong with these people?

You can castigate a movie critic, or for that matter any critic for being unfair.

In fact the (sometimes delightfully and sometimes tediously) bitchy Rex Reed has made a career out of being this.

But simply posting misogynist rants sucks wet farts from dead pigeons, or, as Guardians of the Galaxy writer* Brian Michael Bendis observes, ” You love Captain America? Well, you know what Captain America would never do? Go online anonymously and sh$# on a girl for having an opinion.” (%$ mine)

H/t xkcd for the top comic.

*To be clear, Bendis writes for the comic book, he did not do the screenplay.†
†Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

Sharon’s* Birthday Movie Review

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Her birthday was today, so last night, we saw Captain America: The Winter Soldier.

I am going to try to avoid spoilers, so the cast list is after the break, but I will be putting my guesses as to future movies (when not spoiling this one) above the break. 

First, this is a good movie.  In some ways, the best of the Marvel movies, though as I have said before, I would pay money to listen to Robert Downey Jr. read the phone book.

Captain America is simply more compelling than Iron Man, more relevant than Thor, and less contrived than the Hulk.

This movie deals with a lot of things, but at its core, it is the story of an alien, by which I mean Steve Rogers/Captain America.

He is very from another world, one which has ceased to exist, which from that perspective, is rather a lot like Superman, only Cap is far more aware of this than the guy in the red and blue PJs.

Chris Evans is good as Captain America, and Scarlett Johansson and Samuel L. Jackson reprise their roles as Nick Fury and Natasha Romanoff/Black Widow.

It introduces some new characters, most notably Anthony Mackie who plays Sam Wilson/Falcon, a kickass vet with a flying suit who I think that we will be seeing more, and Emily VanCamp as Kate/Agent 13, in what seems like a future role (if the movie follows the arc of the comic books) as Captain America’s off and on love interest. (Though there is also an indication of some future fireworks between Cap and Black Widow)

Interestingly enough, the movie is rather topical, and fairly explicitly offers a critique of our wonderful world of pervasive digital surveillance that Edward Snowden confirmed to the world.

It does all this while it dealing with the issues of loss and friendship that are inherent in Captain America’s back story.

I would give the movie an 8 out of 10.

*Love of my life, light of the cosmos, she who must be obeyed, my wife.


Cast:
Chris Evans     …     Steve Rogers / Captain America
Samuel L. Jackson     …     Nick Fury
Scarlett Johansson     …     Natasha Romanoff / Black Widow
Robert Redford     …     Alexander Pierce
Sebastian Stan     …     Bucky Barnes / Winter Soldier
Anthony Mackie     …     Sam Wilson / Falcon
Cobie Smulders     …     Maria Hill
Frank Grillo     …     Brock Rumlow
Maximiliano Hernández     …     Jasper Sitwell
Emily VanCamp     …     Kate / Agent 13
Hayley Atwell     …     Peggy Carter
Toby Jones     …     Dr. Arnim Zola
Stan Lee     …     Smithsonian Guard
Callan Mulvey     …     Jack Rollins
Jenny Agutter     …     Councilwoman Hawley

Father’s Day Movie Review: Iron Man 3

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As I’ve noted before, I would pay to listen to Robert Downey, Jr. read the phone book, so we went to see Iron Man 3, in 3-D.

Robert Downey Jr. … Tony Stark
Gwyneth Paltrow … Pepper Potts
Don Cheadle … Colonel James Rhodes
Guy Pearce … Aldrich Killian
Rebecca Hall … Maya Hansen
Jon Favreau … Happy Hogan
Ben Kingsley … The Mandarin
James Badge Dale … Savin
Stephanie Szostak … Brandt
Paul Bettany … Jarvis (voice)
William Sadler … President Ellis
Dale Dickey … Mrs. Davis
Ty Simpkins … Harley Keener
Miguel Ferrer … Vice President Rodriguez
Xueqi Wang … Doctor Wu

This movie will not be a surprise. It’s a part of the franchise, and largely true to the conventions of that franchise.

The downside of the movie is the plot, which is overly complex, and it has problems with coherence and consistency.

This was the same problem with Iron Man 2, which I also enjoyed.

Downey is a joy to watch, but the best performance of the movie is by Sir Ben Kingsley as The Mandarin, which I cannot even begin to describe without spoiling the plot.

The dialogue is punchy, and frequently amusing, much like the two previous sequels, though the best single line comes from neither Downey nor Kingsley, but from an unnamed minion of The Mandarin, who behaves in a way in which minions would in reality.

What I can say is that the film was set around Christmas, which is rather odd for a Summer blockbuster, and a child has a rather prominent role, Ty Simpkins as Harley Keener, and he does not suck.

I also found that Gwynneth Paltrow was a lot less annoying that in the last movie.  She had less hand wringing, and did things, as opposed to being an object to be acted upon.

As to the 3-D, except for explosions and action sequences (admittedly half the movie) it was relatively understated.

I would give it a 7 out of 10.

I Saw Skyfall Tonight

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Family was in town for Thanksgiving, so we all went to see the new Bond film, Skyfall

Daniel Craig … James Bond
Judi Dench Judi Dench … M
Javier Bardem … Silva
Ralph Fiennes … Gareth Mallory
Naomie Harris … Eve
Bérénice Marlohe … Sévérine
Albert Finney … Kincade
Ben Whishaw … Q

Skyfall is a very good movie, though I’m not sure that it’s good Bond per se.

It does not feel like a Bond movie. It feels more like a police procedural, with a bit of John Le Carre and the Bourne movies.

It’s very well done though, and much more character driven than any other Bond movie that I’ve seen. We do get a much more complete picture of James Bond, who he is, and why he is who he is than we have ever gotten before.

My initial impressions:

  • Daniel Craig is magnetic. 
  • Javier Bardem was wonderful to watch, but I wasn’t impressed by the character. As a Bond villain, he was a bit “meh”, and the attempt to graft in some sexual kinks seemed forced.
  • Albert Finney had a relatively small role, but it was important all the same, it provides a lot of the insight into Bond’s character, and he’s just plain fun to watch. (He is also clearly enjoying himself while on camera)
  • Ben Whishaw was good as a very geeky “Q”.
  • Ralph Finnes was a complex and watchable character.
  • Judy Dench was kind of playing Judy Dench more than she was playing “M”.

Recommended. I’d call it 8 out of 10.

No other blogging today.

Movie Reviews

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Over the past few days, we’ve seen a fair number of DVDs and one in theater movies, so here are my reviews:

Captain America:  

It’s still basically a lead-in for the upcoming Avengers movie, but it is a lot better than Thor.

That’s because whole Thor was about the character’s back-story, Captain America is about his story.

Captain America has what the oldest story of any of the Avengers, beginning in 1941, and it ran for nearly 10 years before being folded in the early 1950s.

The Nazis, the Red Skull, etc.  are all a part of the original story arc.

What this means is that we have a real story here, as opposed to Thor‘s, “How did this Asgardean get to earth?” tale.

It also helps that Chris Evans gives a very down to earth performance as Steve Rogers.  He sells it when he says, “I’m just a kid from Brooklyn.”

Iron Man and Iron Man 2:

The best part of both Iron Mans is the performance of Robert Downey, Jr.

He’s fun to watch, and he is believable as a dissolute character who eventually finds redemption.  (Unsurprising)

One little detail that I loved is from the 2nd movie, when he is going through his father’s notes on a power supply, and we see a sketch of a representation of a 3D shadow of a tesseract.

The 4-dimensional hypercube figures prominently in the technology used by the Red Skull in the Captain America movie, and the (not entirely clear) fate of the Red Skull in that movie points back to the interdimensional “bridge” used in Thor.

It’s something you pick up on DVD or PPV, but might miss in the theater.

One thing that I have noted in all of the super-hero movies is that the villains tend to seize whatever scene they are in, and they have many of the best lines, the Red Skull’s, “Not a scratch” is prize.

That being said, Micky Rourkes Ivan Vanko/Whiplash is kind of flat, and I found Sam Rockwell’s Justin Hammer in Iron Man 2 to be far more engaging and funny, as is Gary Shandling’s appearance as a self serving and fatuous Senator.

As to Scarlett Johansson’s introduction as Natasha Romanoff, aka the Black Widow, it’s Scarlett Johansson in a cat suit. What more do you need?

The Adventures of Tintin:

This movie is fairly true to the original comic book/graphic novel serials, and it was a rollicking good time, with a clear sequel in the works, which is also very much in the spirit of the original.

It’s light and fluffy fare, and relishes that fact, which makes it a pleasant diversion.  It’s a well acted adventure fantasy.

I’m not entirely sure why they went with CGI based on motion capture, rather than live action, except for the fact that it allowed them to create the rather caricature like faces of some of the main characters to better match those of the original Hergé comics.

We all saw the film in 3-D, and the technology is much improved over the last 3-D film that I saw in theaters, 1983’s Metalstorm: The Destruction of Jared-Syn.  Once the glasses were on, it just worked, even though I wear glasses myself.

It worked better, and was less obtrusive, at least when the director wasn’t intent on showing it off.

One interesting note here about our theater experience, was that there was something near half an hour of coming attractions, largely also in 3-D, which I rather enjoyed.

Pay Per View Review

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Well, we got around to seeing yet another movie on PPV, Thor (2011).

Chris Hemsworth … Thor
Natalie Portman … Jane Foster
Tom Hiddleston … Loki
Anthony Hopkins … Odin
Stellan Skarsgård … Erik Selvig
Kat Dennings … Darcy Lewis
Clark Gregg … Agent Coulson
Idris Elba … Heimdall
Colm Feore … King Laufey
Ray Stevenson … Volstagg
Tadanobu Asano … Hogun
Josh Dallas … Fandral
Jaimie Alexander … Sif
Rene Russo … Frigga
Adriana Barraza … Isabel Alvarez

This really isn’t a film. It’s a lead-in to the upcoming Avengers movie. Barely worth it as PPV, but I’m really glad I didn’t drop 40+ dollars on a movie tickets for the family, and lord knows what on drinks and snacks.

The two best performances are from Stellan Skarsgård, who does a really good job of portraying a Swede (go figure), and Kat Dennings, who embraces her inner sidekick when her wailings for her lost iPod sounds just like my daughter.

Chris Hemsworth’s Thor is an affable, though rather a thick oaf, which suits the script.

Natalie Portman is winsome and smart love interest, which is kind of her sweet spot of acting.

One of the truths of these movies is that the really interesting character is the villain.  Well, not this time.  Tom Hiddleston’s Loki is just weak.

I’m not sure how much of this is the script, which cannot decide whether or not he is misguided or malevolent.

Anthony Hopkins plays Anthony Hopkins playing Odin.  (Meh)

The movie takes place in two places, Earth and Asgard/Jotunheim.

The Asgard/Jotunheim bits are dull. It’s stilted, and dull. At least they don’t to the “thee” and “thine” bit that I remember as the speech of Asgard when I last read the comic in the 1970s.

Basically the lands of the Gods and the Frost Giants seems to be little more than an excuse for excessive CGI.

There are a couple of funny bits, some car accidents and what can only be described as a “hammer time” party.

For most of the movie, S.H.I.E.L.D. seems to be more sinister than benevolent.

Overall, I would give a 5.5 out of 10, a firm “Meh”.

Pix after the break:



Meh!

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Sharon* had a conference today so I took the kids to a movie.  Because of the schedule, we saw Hop.

It’s not even worth a write up. 

It was completely unmemorable, with a standard “Santa Claus faces an evil elf revolt” and “Two slackers come to responsibility” themes intertwined.

It was simply unmemorable and inoffensive, and you already saw most of the good bits in the coming attractions.

*Love of my life, light of the cosmos, she who must be obeyed, my wife.

Theatrical Run Review

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Well, it’s Christmas, and we are Jewish, so that means Chinese food and a movie.

We got the (Kosher) Chinese food yesterday, in addition to the stir fry that I made (with hearts of palm instead of bamboo shoots), and we went to see a movie in the theater.

We was the latest Jack Black vehicle, Gulliver’s Travels.

Jack Black … Lemuel Gulliver
Jason Segel … Horatio
Emily Blunt … Princess Mary
Amanda Peet … Darcy Silverman
Billy Connolly … King Theodore
Chris O’Dowd … General Edward
T.J. Miller … Dan
James Corden … Jinks
Catherine Tate … Queen Isabelle

It’s pretty much a piece of fluff, with Jack Black playing Jack Black, but Jack Black is amusing.

The plot bears a reasonable relationship first two parts of the book, though it lacks the social and political satire that John Swift put in, but considering that the original was written in 1726, this is unsurprising.

While a Jack Black vehicle, the best performance is actually by Chris O’Dowd, who is the heavy in the film.

Additionally, Amanda Peet gives a good performance, and is just plain hawt in this, though without showing any skin.

A special shout out to the send up of giant robots.

It’s interesting to see the effect of CGI here, because one of the old school, and rather convincing, techniques used in such films, forced perspective, would have helped to make it more realistic.

It was a fun movie, but I would have preferred to see it on pay per view for about ⅕ the price.

Click on the pictures for full size.

Pay Per View Review

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It was time for another family movie night, and Charlie chose Up (2009).

Edward Asner…Carl Fredricksen (voice)
Christopher Plummer…Charles Muntz (voice)
Jordan Nagai…Russell (voice)
Bob Peterson…Dug / Alpha (voice)
Delroy Lindo…Beta (voice)
Jerome Ranft…Gamma (voice)
John Ratzenberger…Construction Foreman Tom (voice)
David Kaye…Newsreel Announcer (voice)
Elie Docter…Young Ellie (voice)
Jeremy Leary…Young Carl (voice)

There are some parts that are very funny, but at its core it’s not a funny film, it’s melancholy.

The issues that are significant parts of plot are about infertility or the loss of a child, the loss of a spouse, the abandonment of a child by his father, and the descent of a childhood hero into murderous obsession.

It is well scripted, well animated, and visually arresting, and it is in its own way rather sweet and touching, but I found it to be a basically sad film.

It’s a good film, but it’s much darker than the normal animated fare.

Pay Per View Review

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Well, it was time for another family movie, and it was my choice, and my Sharon absolutely put her foot down about the Simpsons Movie, so I chose Monsters vs Aliens.

Reese Witherspoon…Susan Murphy / Ginormica (voice)
Seth Rogen … B.O.B. (voice)
Hugh Laurie … Dr. Cockroach Ph.D. (voice)
Will Arnett … The Missing Link (voice)
Kiefer Sutherland … General W.R. Monger (voice)
Rainn Wilson … Gallaxhar (voice)
Stephen Colbert … President Hathaway (voice)
Paul Rudd … Derek Dietl (voice)

It’s an old story, girl is going to get married, girl gets struck by meteor, girl grows to humongous size, girl gets imprisoned in a secret government facility….

Actually, it is an story. It’s the Wizard of Oz story with a bit of a twist.

I realized this about ¾ of the way through the movie.

That being said, it is well animated, well acted, and well scripted, and rather enjoyable.

It’s also a movie that does well with the pause and rewind buttons, because there are a number of fractured takes on old SF films and film conventions.

The big surprise here are appearances by Stephen Colbert as the president of the United States, where he most amusingly chews scenery.

Watch through the credits.

Recommended, with one caveat: If you love the golden gate bridge, you may cry at one point.

Pictures after the flip.

Pay Per View Review

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Well, Verizon FIOS has some occasional specials, basically about 40$ off, $2.99 for a 24 hour rental, as versus $4.99, and so we went with one tonight, Race to Witch Mountain.

Dwayne Johnson … Jack Bruno
AnnaSophia Robb … Sara
Alexander Ludwig … Seth
Carla Gugino … Dr. Alex Friedman
Ciarán Hinds … Henry Burke
Tom Everett Scott … Matheson
Chris Marquette … Pope
Billy Brown … Carson
Garry Marshall … Dr. Donald Harlan
Cheech Marin … Eddie Cortez

The plot, what can I say that you don’t see in the trailer.

You have grizzled ex-con cab driver trying to lead a straight and narrow life, played by Dwayne Johnson, aka, the Rock, alien children with otherworldly powers, a beautiful scientist, evil government agents, and an alien assassin. You know where it goes from there.

The plot is basically a throw-away, there are no surprises.

One thing that is done well with the plot, is that they actually give a reason for children with extraordinary powers to need mere humans. I was pleasantly pleased to see that hole plugged in a way that flowed nicely.

Once again, Dwayne Johnson exceeds my expectations, as he did in Steve Carrel movie Get Smart.

Additionally, you have Garry Marshall, who is perhaps best known for his work on the other side of the camera, engaging in some very amusing scenery chewing.

The original children from the original “Escape to Witch Mountain” movies from the 1970s, Ike Eisenmann, Kim Richards have cameos, and the current child actors, AnnaSophia Robb and Alexander Ludwig, gave decent performances.

The special effects are certainly adequate, not surprising given the state of CGI these days.

The dialog is good, with a lot of very funny deadpan humor. I will say that science fiction/UFO convention held in Los Vegas figures prominently in the movie, as does Sin City itself, and that if you don’t like people making jokes about SF fans, you might be offended, but I was amused.

Additionally, as I went through IMDB, a lot of inside movie references.

It’s a thoroughly pleasant piece of child-friendly fluff, which is exactly what it promised.

Pictures below

Pay Per View Review

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It was my just-turned-12-year-old daughter’s turn to choose a movie, and she chose Twilight.

Kristen Stewart … Bella Swan
Robert Pattinson … Edward Cullen
Billy Burke … Charlie Swan
Ashley Greene … Alice Cullen
Nikki Reed … Rosalie Hale
Jackson Rathbone … Jasper Hale
Kellan Lutz … Emmett Cullen
Peter Facinelli … Dr. Carlisle Cullen
Cam Gigandet … James
Taylor Lautner … Jacob Black
Anna Kendrick … Jessica Stanley
Michael Welch … Mike Newton
Christian Serratos … Angela Weber
Gil Birmingham … Billy Black
Elizabeth Reaser … Esme Cullen

It’s a Vampire film, based on the book, which Natalie read, and enjoyed immensely, and it’s very much geared towards tween girls, and so she loved the book, and so chose the movie.

I really tried to talk her out of it, but she was having none of that, and it is a kind of a reward for her reading, so what can a parent do..

The plot is straight forward, Vampire meets girl, they fall in love, damsel in distress ensues.

For what it was, and I would not see this sort of film except under familial duress, it’s of fairly high quality, well shot, and well acted.

I think that the combat sequences could have been a bit better, but I’m a big fan of Kurasawa’s filming of combat in The Seven Samurai and The Hidden Fortress, which has a level of realism that would not match the target audience (12 year old girls).

It is what it is, and if you like what that is, and I really don’t, you’ll enjoy it.

The only surprises were that there were some legitimately funny bits to it, and I felt no need to claw my eyes out.