Category: Weird

New York Mayor Primary Election and Ranked Choice Voting

With the counting of the in-person votes being more or less finished (this is the famously corrupt and incompetent New York City Board of Elections, after all), what looked like a run-away victory has turned into a nail biter.

Just to remind you, the voting was that you could rate candidates from 1 to 5, and the votes were tabulated based on the first choice initially, giving Brooklyn Borough President Eric Adams 31.6%,  former de Blazio counsel Maya Wiley with 22.3%,  former sanitation commissioner Kathryn Garcia, with 19.7%, and smug asshole Andrew Yang with a dismal 11.7%.

With a normal US style election, what the British call, “First Past the Post,” Adams would be the next mayor of New York.

This was not a normal US style election though, it was ranked choice voting, which is also called instant runoff voting (IRV), though it’s not exactly instant, as we can see from the delay of a bit over a week.

Additionally, the top two finishers were originally numbers 1 and 3 in the first vote.

With IRV,  if no one gets a majority on the first vote, then the person with the lowest total votes in the first round has their votes struck from the tally, and those voters second choice is counted instead.

If no one still has 50%+1 of the votes, the procedure is repeated until someone does have an absolute majority.

In this case, Katheryn Garcia overtook Maya Wiley, and it appears that she is pretty close to Eric Adams, something on the order of 2-3%, with thousands of absentee ballots not yet counted. 

Then those numbers were withdrawn, because they mistakenly included test data, but it is clear that the top 2 at the end of the process will be Adams and Garcia, and that it will be close.

Given that Eric Adams is Black, these results illustrate interesting point about instant RUNOFF voting, which is an artifact of most (if not all) runoff voting systems in the United States, which is that runoff votes allow white voters to get behind the proverbial “White Guy”, which is why it has been a fixture of voting in the South for years.

Without getting into the weeds of the relative merits of first past the post versus instant runoff voting versus proportional representation, I think that it is clear that any runoff system, whether instant or traditional, will make it more difficult for a minority candidate to win.

It’s troubling, and so I have mixed emotions about the whole process:

The New York City mayor’s race plunged into chaos on Tuesday night when the city Board of Elections released a new tally of votes in the Democratic mayoral primary, and then removed the tabulations from its website after citing a “discrepancy.”

The results released earlier in the day had suggested that the race between Eric Adams and his two closest rivals had tightened significantly.

But just a few hours after releasing the preliminary results, the elections board issued a cryptic tweet revealing a “discrepancy” in the report, saying that it was working with its “technical staff to identify where the discrepancy occurred.”

By Tuesday evening, the tabulations had been taken down, replaced by a new advisory that the ranked-choice results would be available “starting on June 30.”

Then, around 10:30 p.m., the board finally released a statement, explaining that it had failed to remove sample ballot images used to test its ranked-choice voting software. When the board ran the program, it counted “both test and election night results, producing approximately 135,000 additional records,” the statement said. The ranked-choice numbers, it said, would be tabulated again.

………

For the Board of Elections, which has long been plagued by dysfunction and nepotism, this was its first try at implementing ranked-choice voting on a citywide scale, and skeptics had expressed doubts about the board’s ability to pull off the process despite its successful use in other cities.

Under ranked-choice voting, voters can list up to five candidates on their ballots in preferential order. If no candidate receives more than 50 percent of first-choice votes in the first round, the winner is decided by a process of elimination: As the lower-polling candidates are eliminated, their votes are reallocated to whichever candidate those voters ranked next, and the process continues until there is a winner.

………

A few hours later, the board disclosed its unspecified discrepancy, and it was not at all clear Tuesday night how accurate the most recent tally was, or if it was accurate at all.

The results may well be scrambled again: Even after the Board of Elections sorts through the preliminary tally, it must count around 124,000 Democratic absentee ballots. Once they are tabulated, the board will take the new total that includes them and run a new set of ranked-choice elimination rounds, with a final result not expected until mid-July.

………

If elected, Mr. Adams would be the city’s second Black mayor, after David N. Dinkins. Some of Mr. Adams’s supporters have already cast the ranked-choice process as an attempt to disenfranchise voters of color, an argument that intensified among some backers on Tuesday afternoon as the race had appeared to tighten, and is virtually certain to escalate should he lose his primary night lead to Ms. Garcia, who is white.

It appears that I’m not the only one who thinks that runoffs tend to disadvantage minority candidates.

………

While it is difficult, it is not unheard-of for a trailing candidate in a ranked-choice election to eventually win the race through later rounds of voting — that happened in Oakland, Calif., in 2010, and nearly occurred in San Francisco in 2018.

The winner of New York’s Democratic primary, who is almost certain to become the city’s next mayor, will face Curtis Sliwa, the founder of the Guardian Angels, who won the Republican primary.

Yeah, that racist clown is the Republican nominee, so the primary is the real election here, even if the eventual nominee is found in bed with Donald Trump.

………

Other close observers of the election separately expressed discomfort with the decision to release a ranked-choice tally without accounting for absentee ballots.

Yeah, this has been completely mismanaged.

BTW, did I mention that the board of elections also sent out the absentee ballots late in 2020? 

The good citizens of New York are in for a bumpy ride.

This is an Outrage

In an otherwise anodyne article about how modern super-hero animation is uniquely innovative and edgy, (This same article has  written at least once every 18 months or so since at least 1980) they release a bit of shocking news, that the producers of the Harley Quinn animated series were forced to delete a scene where Batman went down on Catwoman.

They though that it was the wrong image for a hero, which is complete crap.  Real heroes, and real men, lick pussy.*

My reaction upon hearing the news was, “Will No One Rid Me of these Turbulent Media Executives?”

Seriously, the Harley Quinn series is profane, with “S” and “F” Bombs, sexual innuendo, violence, murders, and and theater people, how could they not have Batman NOT demonstrating is consideration to his true love’s pleasure?

I am profoundly disappointed, and I want to see if there is a suppressed clip of this on the internet.  It could be the new butthole cut of cats:

“It’s incredibly gratifying and free to be using characters that are considered villains because you just have so much more leeway,” says Halpern. “A perfect example of that is in this third season of ‘Harley’ [when] we had a moment where Batman was going down on Catwoman. And DC was like, ‘You can’t do that. You absolutely cannot do that.’ They’re like, ‘Heroes don’t do that.’ So, we said, ‘Are you saying heroes are just selfish lovers?’ They were like, ‘No, it’s that we sell consumer toys for heroes. It’s hard to sell a toy if Batman is also going down on someone.’”

(In fairness to DC, both Halpern and Schumacker went on to say that the company has been remarkably supportive of their series and has allowed them to push the envelope numerous times. Still, it remains to be seen if Batman and Catwoman will be shown engaging in some bedroom antics in Season 3 or if it will simply be implied via cunning linguistics.)

I want the to see the caring and sharing lover cut of that Harly Quinn episode.

This is not The Onion, it’s Variety.

*Don’t hatge me because I made this joke. If you had thought of it, you would have too.

It’s a reference to the conflict between Thomas à Becket and King Henry II of England. Read a history book.

Unless you think that his true love is Dick Grayson/Robin/Nightwing, but that is would take me down a rabbit hole that involve at least a dozen posts.

Mixed Emotions


Surreal

French President Emmanuel Macron was working a crowd line, and someone in the crowd slapped the crap out of him.

At first, I thought that this was the feel good story of the day, because Macron has serious  Backpfeifengesicht.*

Unfortunately, this man who slapped him is someone who is in serious need of a kick in the ass.

Emmanuel Macron was slapped in the face by a man during a walkabout in southern France.

The president’s security detail immediately pulled the man to the ground and moved Macron away from the crowd, though the president appeared unhurt and determined to continue meeting the public.

Afterwards, the French leader said the assault was “an isolated act” that should be “put into perspective”.

“We mustn’t let ultra-violent individuals take over the public debate … There can be no violence, no hatred, not in speech or action. Otherwise it’s democracy itself that is threatened.”

A video of the incident showed the president, in a white shirt and tie, approach onlookers waiting behind metal barriers at Tain-l’Hermitage in the Drôme department.

Macron, wearing a mask, is seen reaching out to shake hands with a man in a green T-shirt wearing glasses and a mask.

Reuters reported the man was heard shouting “à bas la Macronie” (down with Macronism) before he grabbed the president’s right arm and delivered a slap to the left side of his face. He was also reported to have shouted “Montjoie Saint Denis”, the battle cry of the French armies when the country was a monarchy.

The guy was almost certainly a right wing racist French Royalist.  You know, the folks who still think that Albert Dreyfus was guilty, and they make Marine Le Pen (who, to her credit strongly condemned the attack) look like Rachel Maddow.

So, Macron gets slapped, and this douche bag ends up in the slam for a few months.

I can live with that, I guess.

*It’s German for, “A face that begs to be slapped.

This Reminds Me of a Very Bad Movie in an Overlong Series


Artist rendering of their services


My bad, here is an actual photo

Have you heard the one about the Texas church that worships the AR-15?

No, this is not a pitch for a bad movie that cribs unabashedly from the 1970 stinker Beneath the Planet of the Apes, and this is not The Onion, it’s just an ordinary Sunday service in Texas.

Can we give them back to Mexico?

A religious sect known for worshipping with AR-15s and its MAGA politics has purchased a sprawling, 40-acre compound in central Texas, which it hopes will offer a safe-haven for “patriots” from what they believe is an imminent war brought by the “deep state,” VICE News has learned.

The property, located in the small community of Thornton, 40 miles from Waco, was listed at just under $1 million. It’s been dubbed “Liberty Rock” by its new owners, the Sanctuary Church aka Rod of Iron Ministries, led by Pastor Hyung Jin “Sean” Moon. Members of the congregation often refer to him as “King.”

While Moon’s congregation, estimated to number in the hundreds, is relatively fringe, it’s a direct descendant of the much larger Unification Church, founded by his father, Rev. Sun Myung Moon, a self-proclaimed messiah and accused cult leader whose adoring followers became known to outsiders as “Moonies.”

The younger Moon, who set up shop in 2017 in Newfoundland, Pennsylvania, follows the doctrine of his late father—with a twist. Moon says he was inspired by a biblical passage in the Book of Revelation that talked about Jesus using a “rod of iron” to protect himself and others. He concluded this was a reference to AR-15s, and integrated high-powered firearms into regular church services, including wedding ceremonies. He founded the church with the support of his brother, Kook-jin “Justin” Moon, the CEO of Kahr Arms, a gun manufacturing company headquartered nearby.

BTW, he was at the insurrection on January 6, though it appears that he did not enter the Capitol, though he did get tear gassed.

The folks who write for The Onion really have their job cut out for them to top this one.

H/t ECop at the Stellar Parthenon BBS.

I Kind of Like the Frantically Mating Arthropods

I am referring to the Brood X Cicadas, of course.

Unlike the last time around, the volume is such that it does not penetrate the walls of my house, we moved a few miles north in the interim, and I find their calls kind of flutey.

When we were down in Northwest Baltimore, they were loud enough to be physically painful at times.

Charlie, on the other hand, finds it relentlessly desperate and filled with dread and .

I explained to him that desperation and existential angst (my term, not his) are why creatures procreate in the first place:  Having a progeny creates a legacy, and meaning.

It’s awfully deeply philosophy for a bunch of frantically f%$#ing bugs, at least for me.

I’m an engineer, I don’t look for solutions to major problems of existence, I just try to get, “Close Enough.”

Some People Cannot Resist Posting Kittens

For me, it’s farts:

A woman on TikTok has left people in stitches with her story about a time she ripped a fart in a spin class that led to a total evacuation of all people on the premises.

………

“This one time I went to a spin class after a heavy night of drinking and 4am kebabs…”

Then it happened.

“…And I farted a fart that smelled so bad that a girl threw up and they had to evacuate the gym because they thought they had a sewage problem.”

She was apparently glad to finally get it off her chest.

“I was too embarassed to tell them it was just me. So now, eight years later, I’m telling you guys.”

@maximevdd

Tell me your greatest fart stories. Can you beat that? #fyp #gym #gymproblems #fart #spinclass #hangover #embarrassing #ohno #fartsfordays #drunk

♬ Oh No – Kreepa

How is this woman still single?  Not mocking her.  Women who find farts funny are rare and should be treasured.

Also, it beats my story of Prednisone fueled farts, when I let one site slip out silently that violated the chemical weapons convention at the same time that my my dad loudly farted while we were in the car, and he took the blame from the rest of the family for 15 minutes until I fessed up.

What About Turtles Farting?

A series of studies have revealed that mammals can breath through the butt-holes.

Brought a bit of family lore, about turtles farting, to my mind:

When pressed for oxygen, some fish and sea cucumbers will use their lower intestines to get a little extra out of their environment. Now, a team of Japanese researchers say that mammals are also capable of respirating through their rectal cavity, at least in a lab setting.

The team’s research is published today in the journal Med and describes the capacity for mice, rats, and pigs to survive longer and have more strength in low-oxygen circumstances when given oxygen gas or an oxygen-rich liquid through their rectums, in a process similar to an enema. While fish like loaches and catfish use a similar method to gain additional oxygen in the natural world, this doesn’t appear to be an evolutionary adaptation for mammals. In other words, mammalian bodies can’t naturally do this, but with a little push from modern science, it becomes possible. Previous research has seen oxygen injected directly into mammalian bloodstreams, prolonging the lives of rabbits, but the rectal approach to the low-oxygen problem is novel.

The experiment, while disturbing, was designed to find new ways to save the lives of people whose lungs are failing.

It’s a valuable study, but all I can think about turtles farting.

 

Going Down the Wikipedia Rabbit Hole

I am sure that most of you have experienced this, you look up something, and you go to the Wikipedia page, and there is an interesting link, and you go there, and before you know it, you have clicked on 20+ different links, and you are looking at something completely unrelated to where you started.

Well, I did this today, I was looking up the comedy team of John Clarke and Bryan Dawe, after posting their classic sketch, The Front Fell Off, and I ended up on the sport of ferret-legging.

Ferret legging is a sport in which men (and it is almost always men) stuff ferrets down their trousers, and the one who can do this for the longest time wins:

Ferret-legging was an endurance test or stunt in which ferrets were trapped in trousers worn by a participant. Also known as put ’em down and ferret-down-trousers, it seems to have been popular among coal miners in Yorkshire, England. Contestants put live ferrets inside their trousers; the winner is the one who is the last to release the animals.

Ferret-legging may have originated during the time when only the relatively wealthy in England were allowed to keep animals used for hunting, forcing poachers to hide their illicit ferrets in their trousers. Following a brief resurgence in popularity during the 1970s, it has been described as a “dying sport”, although a national ferret-legging event was held in Richmond, Virginia from 2003 to 2009.

Description and rules

In the sport of ferret-legging, competitors tie their trousers at the ankles before placing two ferrets inside and securely fastening their belts to prevent the ferrets from escaping. Each competitor then stands in front of the judges for as long as he can. Competitors cannot be drunk or drugged, nor can the ferrets be sedated. In addition, competitors are not allowed to wear underwear beneath their trousers, which must allow the ferrets free access from one leg to the other, and the ferrets must have a full set of teeth that must not have been filed or otherwise blunted. The winner is the person who lasts the longest.

The sport is said to involve very little “native skill”, simply an ability to “have your tool bitten and not care”. The former world champion, Reg Mellor, is credited with instituting the practice of wearing white trousers in ferret-legging matches, to better display the blood from the wounds caused by the animals. Competitors can attempt, from outside their trousers, to dislodge the ferrets, but as the animals can maintain a strong hold for long periods, their removal can be difficult. The ferrets are occasionally put inside the contestants’ shirts in addition to their trousers. An attempt to introduce a female version of the sport—ferret busting, in which female contestants introduced ferrets down their blouses—proved unsuccessful.

This is profoundly weird, and having been exposed to the story Sredni Vashtar by Saki at a young age, it is certainly not a sport that I have any interest in participating in, though right now I am craving a piece of buttered toast. (It’s Passover, so I am REALLY craving a piece of buttered toast)

Quote of the Day

Look, is the seller a vampire?

No, not that I’m aware of.

If he was, would you be allowed to say, or is there some kind of realtor privilege?

Well, in real estate we talk about the property, not the people, because of housing discrimination.

Oh, that’s a good point. I don’t know if vampires are a protected class.

I’ve learned in fair housing seminar after fair housing seminar, you do not talk about people. You want me to tell you how many square feet or how long the driveway or what it looks like inside, no problem.

Slate, interviewing a realtor trying to sell a vampire-goth themed house in Baltimore.

The listing is linked to in the article, and it’s a trip.

Iawn, Pa Un Ohonoch Chi Sydd Wedi Bod Yn Ffycin Defaid? *

It appears that as a result of Covid-19, efforts to reduce the population of feral goats has been curtailed, and so feral Llandudno Goats have been running rampant over portions of Wales

Is it just me, or does anyone else have an image of some poor bureaucrat trying to convince goats to wear a condom?

The goats of the Great Orme headland in Wales were a worldwide sensation during the first Covid lockdown last year after they were pictured roaming brazenly around the deserted streets of nearby Llandudno.

This year there has been a population explosion of the kashmiri goats in their north Wales headland home after the Covid crisis forced countryside wardens to cancel a planned contraception campaign.

………

Sally Pidcock, warden of the Great Orme country park, said there were estimated to be about 30 billy goats – the males are the ones that tend to travel – at large Llandudno and roughly 150 less adventurous males, plus females and kids, back on the Great Orme.

Pidcock said a campaign to give contraceptive injections to nanny goats last summer had to be postponed because of Covid. “It means there are more kids being born on the Great Orme now than there would have been,” she said. As long as Covid allows, a contraceptive vaccination campaign will take place this summer.

We live in strange times.

*This is Welsh for, “Which one of you boys been f%$#ing the sheep?

This Will Not End Well

So, the new hot thing is a payments processor called Stripe, and it is planning for an IPO and has just announced a $95 billion valuation with its series H funding round.

I’m generally dubious of “Unicorns”, and when I did a quick Google on Stripe, it appeared to be a fairly anodyne supplier payments processing, with the only “Innovation” I could see being its incorporation in Ireland, which will allow it to avoid most taxes.  (There appears to be no “Secret Sauce.”)

It’s a dull, if profitable, business with relatively low barriers to entry, but suddenly everyone is talking about making bank when it goes IPO.

I’m not saying that it’s a fraudulent operation, its business model appears to be solid, if rather dull.  What I AM saying is that its funding seems to be less about the business than it is about creating a hubbub which which will allow those institutional funders to fill their pockets, walk away, and the retail investor takes the losses when gravity returns:

The payments company Stripe is worth $95 billion after a new round of funding, making it the most valuable start-up in the United States.

The San Francisco and Dublin-based company said on Sunday that it had raised $600 million in new funding from investors including Sequoia Capital, Fidelity Management and Ireland’s National Treasury Management Agency. The investment nearly triples Stripe’s last valuation of $35 billion.

The funding comes amid a surge in the adoption of digital tools and services in the pandemic as more people live, work and make purchases online. That has fueled a wave of investment into, and eye-popping valuations at, tech start-ups, as well as a frenzy of highly valued initial public offerings. Investors have valued Airbnb, the home rental start-up that recently went public, at $123 billion. Roblox, a kids gaming start-up, saw its valuation soar to $45 billion when it went public last week.

Founded in 2010, Stripe builds software that enables businesses to process payments online. As more people have turned to online shopping in the pandemic, Stripe’s offerings have been in demand. It is the largest among a class of fast-growing, highly valued financial technology companies.

Then again, I am always profoundly skeptical of the, “Next Big Thing.”

Headline of the Day

The Problem with Moving to Florida Is You Have to Live in Florida!

The Daily Mail

It appears that expats from New York City have decided that the diminished quality of life in Florida is not worth the lower taxes and are returning to the Empire State:

Wall Street titans who moved to Miami amid New York City’s coronavirus lockdown are already eyeing a return to the Big Apple, according to a new report.

Late last year, Florida was touted as the future hub of American finance as a slew of billion-dollar businesses opened up offices in the Sunshine State.

The uber-wealthy were lured to Florida by better weather, lower taxes and fewer  restrictions imposed on residents amid the COVID-19 pandemic.

But Bloomberg claims that a number of billionaires are now having second thoughts about life in Miami because the cultural and educational opportunities just don’t compare to those in the Big Apple.

The main problem with moving to Florida is that you have to live in Florida,’ Jason Mudrick, who oversees $3 billion at Mudrick Capital Management in NYC, told the publication.

(emphasis mine)

Yeah, and this is with Florida having a relatively mild hurricane season. (The rest of the Caribbean basin and Carolinas were not so lucky)

In addition, you have Ron Desnatis, Rick Scott, Jeb Bush, an infestation of pythons, cane toads, mass shootings, and a Grim Reaper on the beach.

This Says Something Interesting About American Management

Though I haven’t quite figured out what.

The CIA has released a WWII manual on sabotage, and it appears to describe life in modern American businesses frighteningly accurately:

In 1944, the CIA’s precursor, the Office of Strategic Services (OSS), distributed a secret pamphlet that was intended as a guidebook to citizens living in Axis nations who were sympathetic to the Allies.

The “Simple Sabotage Field Manual,” declassified in 2008 and available on the CIA’s website, provided instructions for how everyday people could help the Allies weaken their country by reducing production in factories, offices, and transportation lines. 

………

See if any of those listed below — quoted but abridged — remind you of your boss, colleagues, or even yourself.

Organizations and Conferences 

  • Insist on doing everything through “channels.” Never permit short-cuts to be taken in order to expedite decisions.
  • Make “speeches.” Talk as frequently as possible and at great length. Illustrate your “points” by long anecdotes and accounts of personal experiences.
  • When possible, refer all matters to committees, for “further study and consideration.” Attempt to make the committee as large as possible — never less than five.
  • Bring up irrelevant issues as frequently as possible.
  • Haggle over precise wordings of communications, minutes, resolutions.
  • Refer back to matters decided upon at the last meeting and attempt to re-open the question of the advisability of that decision.
  • Advocate “caution.” Be “reasonable” and urge your fellow-conferees to be “reasonable”and avoid haste which might result in embarrassments or difficulties later on.

Managers 

  • In making work assignments, always sign out the unimportant jobs first. See that important jobs are assigned to inefficient workers.
  • Insist on perfect work in relatively unimportant products; send back for refinishing those which have the least flaw.
  • To lower morale and with it, production, be pleasant to inefficient workers; give them undeserved promotions.
  • Hold conferences when there is more critical work to be done.
  • Multiply the procedures and clearances involved in issuing instructions, pay checks, and so on. See that three people have to approve everything where one would do.

Employees

  • Work slowly.
  • Contrive as many interruptions to your work as you can.
  • Do your work poorly and blame it on bad tools, machinery, or equipment. Complain that these things are preventing you from doing your job right.
  • Never pass on your skill and experience to a new or less skillful worker.

I’m sure that my dad, who spent much of his professional life as a consultant in management and organization, is familiar with these hallmarks of a dysfunctional organization.

I’m also wondering just how surprised he is that these behaviors are indistinguishable from deliberate sabotage.

I Have This Strange Urge to Be Taken into Custody in Sweden

In Sweden, a police officer was out sun bathing with friends, when she discovered that a friend’s cell phone had been stolen.

She went into action in a thoroughly nontraditional uniform:

The Swedish off-duty police officer has told The Local about the story behind this viral picture [not posting it here, it’s at the link] capturing the moment she wrestled a brazen criminal to the ground – while wearing a bikini.

Mikaela Kellner and her friends were sunbathing in the Rålambshov park in Stockholm when a man walked up to them pretending to sell magazines for homeless people. When he refused to take no for an answer, but instead lingered around their blankets, she started suspecting that something was wrong.

“I told my friends to keep an eye on their things. But as soon as he left one of my friends said ‘where did my mobile phone go?'” Kellner told The Local on Thursday.

She explained that the man had used his magazines to cover the mobile phone, picking it up without anyone noticing when he left. Let’s just say this was a decision he would soon come to regret.

“There was no time, so I ran after him, maybe 15 metres or so. One of my friends is also a police officer, so we got hold of him. He tried to get away so we held onto him harder,” she said.

They called their colleagues on duty who were able to get there to arrest him.

Kellner has been a police officer for 11 years, but it is the first time she has nabbed a suspect while wearing a bikini. She said a picture she posted on Instagram quickly went viral after Aftonbladet wrote about it.

I’m kind of surprised that this hasn’t hit the late night talk shows, it seems ready made for them.