Category: Weird

This Election is Getting Weird

3 Comments

First, Joe Miller says that the Berlin Wall is a good thing, and now he has his own merry band of Brownshirts

So, it appears that Alaska Republican Senate nominee has hired hired goons to harass the press in order to prevent them from asking him questions, and they just assaulted and handcuffed a journalist:

The editor of the Alaska Dispatch website was arrested by U.S. Senate candidate Joe Miller’s private security guards Sunday as the editor attempted to interview Miller at the end of a public event in an Anchorage school.

Tony Hopfinger was handcuffed by the guards and detained in a hallway at Central Middle School until Anchorage police came and told the guards to release Hopfinger.

I keep expecting this crowd to burst into Tomorrow Belongs to Me.

Christine O’Donnell may be the sane one of this lot.

Our political culture is broken in some very profound ways, and I have no clue as to how to fix it.

And the Winner of the Economics Prize Is

No Comments

The executives and directors of Goldman Sachs, AIG,Lehman Brothers, Bear Stearns, Merrill Lynch, and Magnetar for creating and promoting new ways to invest money — ways that maximize financial gain and minimize financial risk for the world economy, or for a portion thereof.

They are, of course winners of the 2010 Ig Nobel Prize, who, in 2009, awarded the prize to, “The directors, executives, and auditors of four Icelandic banks The directors, executives, and auditors of four Icelandic banks — Kaupthing Bank, Landsbanki, Glitnir Bank, and Central Bank of Iceland — for demonstrating that tiny banks can be rapidly transformed into huge banks, and vice versa — and for demonstrating that similar things can be done to an entire national economy.”

I so want to get one of these prizes, but I think that I lack the requisite imagination.

Teabaggers Hate Puppies

No Comments

No, I’m serious. I’m not joking, and it’s not The Onion.

I mean that they have come out in favor of abusive puppy mills in Missouri.

Why are they doing this? Because puppies are just like cattle to Teabaggers, because, I guess, They Eat Puppies!!1!!

Again, really, I’m not joking:

A conservative group in Missouri is picking up the backing of the Tea Party and Joe The Plumber in its quest to stop the Humane Society of the United States (HSUS) and other animal rights groups from passing “radical” anti-puppy mill legislation.

………

The Alliance For Truth also has the support of some better-known conservative activists, like Joe ‘The Plumber’ Wurzelbacher, who wrote on the Alliance For Truth site that the HSUS is “cowardly hiding behind animal cruelty, lying to our citizens and taking our constitutional rights away – one state at a time.”

He continues:

This bill forces breeders to limit the number of dogs they can own – regardless of care. Think about this a minute . . . . Should the government have the right to limit the number of houses a realtor can sell? Or the number of cattle a rancher can raise?

To serve puppies, it’s a cookbook!!!!!

<Facepalm>

Barack Obama, Watch This and Learn

No Comments

Why yes, that is the President of Bolivia, and he is driving someone’s testicles to the top of Nevado Sajama* (0:35)

Someone had the grand idea of having political rivals in Bolivia play a friendly game of football (soccer).

So, when you have political enemies on the field, what happens?

Well, it appears that there was a bit of rough play:

During a soccer match between teams of political rivals in Bolivia, the country’s president, Evo Morales, was caught on tape delivering a swift knee to an opponent’s groin in retaliation for a hard foul.

As Rory Carroll reported for The Guardian, the incident took place on Sunday in the Bolivian capital, La Paz, as the president’s men took on a team led by the city’s mayor, Luis Revilla.

Mr. Obama, the next time that John Boehner opens his mouth, take your cue from Bolivian President Evo Moralez, please.

*The tallest mountain in Bolivia.

So Far in the Closet He’s Found Narnia*

No Comments

Let’s Roll Tape

An Assistant Attorney General for the state of Michigan, one Andrew Shirvell, has engaged in what can only be described as a relentless campaign of stalking, both Cyber and Real, against the Chris Armstrong, the gay president of the student assembly. (See the embedded vid)

Shirvell has now been placed on leave and is facing a disciplinary hearing, despite the fact that Michigan AG, and Christofascist right-winger, Mike Cox, has defended the right to stalk someone for being gay, no doubt because this is how Cox defines his base.

The crux of the batsh%$ insane jihad seems to be Armstrong’s push for LGBT friendly housing on campus, which has led the Assistant AG to make blog posts with swastikas, and to allegedly hang around and photograph Armstrong’s house in the early hours of the meeting, which has led him to file for a restraining order against Shirvell.

In the scheme of things, this incident will work itself out in the near term, the restraining order will likely be granted, and I’m pretty sure that Shirvell will eventually be fired, despite his being a long time supporter, and campaign worker, for Cox, because this has simply gotten too politically toxic.

This would all be silly and funny, but I figure than in the next 10-15 years, as Shirvell realizes what he is, and the video makes it clear that he is deeply in the closet, we are likely to hear a story about him in which the lede is, “Killed his wife and children, and then shot himself.”

*The bon mot is not mine, it’s from Bladesmith at the by invitation only Stellar Parthenon BBS.

I Think That it Might Be a Blasphemous Rumor,

No Comments
At least, there is symmetry.

Zathras is used to being beast of burden to other people’s needs. Very sad life. Probably have very sad death. But…

but I think that God has a sick sense of humor,
and when I die, I expect to find him laughing:

In a bizarre twist, James Heselden, owner of the company that makes the two-wheeled Segway personal transporter, died Sunday morning in a Segway-related mishap — just before the scheduled release of a study suggesting injuries related to the vehicles may be on the rise.

According to a witness report, Heselden, 62, apparently fell off a 30-foot cliff into a river while riding a Segway near his home in West Yorkshire, UK. Police found Heselden’s body and a Segway personal transporter in the river. He was prounced dead at the scene and foul play is not suspected, West Yorkshire Police told reporters.

A short statement posted on the Segway company website noted that Heselden “died in a tragic accident.”

I think that I have commented before on the tremendous suckitude that is the Segway, and I do understand that this is a deep personal life for Heselden’s family, but this is just plain freaky.

Number 7 on he List of Things That I Really Did Not Want to Know

No Comments
Click for full size

Ewwwww! Both the Pill and the Smile

It appears that members of the Orthodox Jewish community in Williamsburg, New York are using anal caffeine suppositories to deal with withdrawal from go juice:

Jews throughout Williamsburg snapped up caffeine suppositories today, hours before the start of the Yom Kippur fast that would deprive them of the jolt — and hunger suppression — that coffee typically provides.

The day-long fast is the centerpiece of the holiest day on the Jewish calendar — but some religious Jews see a Talmudic loophole that allows them to ingest their daily dose of caffeine, albeit through a different orifice.

“It helps — you know, it’s hard to concentrate when you’re fasting and also addicted to caffeine,” said Baruch Herzfeld, an Orthodox Jew who owns a bike store in Williamsburg. “Some take it before sundown, but most take it throughout their fasting. These guys love a good loophole.”

You know, tapering off over the few weeks before is both more in keeping with the spirit Halacha.*

*Jewish Law.

People With Way Too Much Free Time

No Comments

The Terran Research Ensemble, who are putting on an Opera in Klingon:

On Friday in The Hague, Netherlands, the Terran Research Ensemble raised the curtain on “U,” the first Earth opera performed entirely in Klingon. “U” is the Klingon word for “universe” or “universal,” and the opera tells the story of Kahless the Unforgettable, said to be the first Klingon emperor.

“Klingon are known as passionate opera lovers but at the same time very little was known about Klingon opera here so as far as I was concerned that was a very interesting challenge to try and make an authentic, or as authentic, something out of that as possible,” U co-creator Floris Schonfeld told Reuters and The BBC.

I will say that is only the 2nd most absurd juxtaposition of art and language, after the effort by South Africa in the Apartheid days to translate Shakespeare into Afrikaans:

Hamlet: Mein Papa der schpook!

Great Googly Moogly!

No Comments

There was a guy in Amarillo who wanted to burn a Koran on September 11, but a skater dude took the book away from him. No big deal I guess.

Induhvidual in question, one David Grisham, is a lone crazy, though, seeing as how he is from Texas, he’s not quite so lonely: Texas breeds this sort of Nutjob, see Koresh, David, and the Republican Party of Texas.

What does distinguish this guy from your run of the mill crazy is his day job, he guards a a nuclear weapons plant:

According to George Schwarz, the editor and publisher of the Amarillo Independent, Grisham is an armed guard at the B&W Pantax plutonium plant, north of Amarillo, Texas.

The Pantex plant describes its mission as “maintaining the safety, security and reliability of the nation’s nuclear weapons stockpile. The facility is managed and operated by B&W Pantex for the U.S. Department of Energy/National Nuclear Security Administration.”

The Wiki callse Pantex, “America’s only nuclear weapons assembly and disassembly facility.”

It’s a good thing that Timothy McVeigh didn’t know this guy, or his bomb wouldn’t have been a bunch of fertilizer.

Un-Dirtyword-believable.

There is a Reason that I Declared them “They Who Must Not Be Named”

No Comments

But that hasn’t stopped the Voice of American from recruiting them to try and pacify angry people in the Middle East:

In what is evidently an attempt to mitigate the damage caused by Koran-burning pastors, the US government will attempt to dissuade outraged citizens of the Middle East from joining al-Qaeda by beaming Paris Hilton, Kim Kardashian and Britney Spears across the Voice of America’s airwaves.

According to Press Gazette, Splash News and Pictures will provide a half-hour weekly show packed with meaty celebutardiness, aimed at winning the hearts and minds of those still undecided whether Holy War or Hollywood is the way to go.

First, I will note that if VoA is doing this, the Arab world is going to try and beat us to death with their bare hands.

Second, I have not yet put Kim Kardashian on my list of They Who Must Not Be Named, but ………

Wait for it ………

Wait for it ………

Wait for it ………

She is now.

Great googly moogley.

Spıinal Tap Drummer Syndrome Claims ELO Cellistge 62

No Comments

Mike Edwards of ELO died on September 3 when a 700 pound hay bale that came down a slope and crushed his van.

My first thought was that it sounded like the demise of a drummer for Spinal Tap.*

I’ve never been a big fan of the band, and obviously, Mr. Edwards has been out of the limelight for 35 years, since he left the ELO, and my condolences go to his friends and family.

That being said, what is it with rock and rollers and bizarre deaths?

On a note closer to home, obviously none of us can be certain when death might strike, whether it’s a heart attack, or a 50 stone hay bale.

It’s something to think about this (Jewish) New Year.

*Spinal tap drummers have

  • Died in a bizarre gardening accident, that the authorities said was “best left unsolved”.
  • Choked on vomit of unknown origin, other than his own, because “[y]ou can’t really dust for vomit.”
  • Spontaneously combusted.
  • Creme Brulee commitments forced him to retire, but went on backing tambourine for tour in 1982.
  • Claimed he “couldn’t take this 4/4 sh%$”; according to an MTV interview with Spinal Tap in November 1991, he disappeared along with the equipment during their Japanese tour. He is either dead or playing jazz.
  • Allegedly sold his dialysis machine for drugs; presumed dead.
  • Eaten by his pet python Cleopatra.
  • Exploded onstage.

Sunse? Space Goatse*?

No Comments
Click for full size

There is a reason why the comments at io9 are so rude.

Space Goatse†

The Big Bear Solar Observatory (BBSO) has published what is the most detailed photo of a The clearest photo of a sunspot we’ve seen thus far.

But this is not what I, or many of the folks who commented about the picture.

It was about 50-50 between people who thought that it looked like the eye of Sauron, and people who thought that it resembled a certain unspeakable Internet meme.

Me, I never saw the Lord of the Rings movies, so you can guess where my mind went.

In any case, if you want to review the comments on the thread, and you understand the context,* then you may find significant amusement regarding what is otherwise a straightforward science story.

H/t hedgehog on by invitation only Stellar Parthenon BBS for finding this little “gem”.

*If you don’t know what Goatse is, for the sake of all that is holy, do not Google it!
†Thank SupaChupacabra at io9 for this bit of wit.

Whiskey Tango Foxtrot?!?!?!?

No Comments

First, I hear news that some guy flipped out and allegedly stabbed, Ahmed Sharif, a cabbie in New York because the drive was Muslim, and now we discover that this guy worked for a multicultural organization promoting peace and tolerance:

As you’ve seen in our earlier reports, we have what appears to be a straight-up hate crime, in which an NYC cabbie picks up a fare, passenger asks him if he’s Muslim and then stabs him in the neck. The NYPD says Michael Enright, 21, is going to be charged with 2nd degree attempted murder and a hate crime. (See the statement from the victim here.)

Only then things get a little weird. Enright is not who you’d expect. He’s a film student who’d recently been either volunteering for or employed by Intersection International, a multifaith and multicultural effort which seeks to promote justice and peace. And the group has very publicly come out in favor of the Cordoba House project, what opponents call the “Ground Zero Mosque.”

Needless to say, that’s a bit difficult to figure.

This is just freaky, and I just don’t get it, though reports indicate that a significant amount of alcohol was involved.

But if you are talking about this tomorrow, note that the “New York cabbie” has a name, Ahmed Sharif, and remember his name.