So there I was, at work, sitting on the toilet, and my cell phone rings.
It’s Natalie’s friend, Samantha. I believe that I had Natalie call her on our cell phone to say that we were going to be late, and she called back to my phone.
While I am taking a dump.
A show of hands please about our connected society:
How many of you would like to line our bathrooms with tin-foil to block cell phones?
How about movie theaters?
How many have begun to consider tinfoil hats?
You get the picture. If you don’t, here it is.
It’s been a while since I’ve said this, but I really enjoy the Register.
This is why I don’t name things, I would have called it “Clitoral-B”.
LoveHoney in toothbrush vibrator trademark rumpus
Oral-B sex shocker
By Lester Haines
Published Tuesday 12th June 2007 10:21 GMTNSFW Online sex toy outfit LoveHoney has got itself into hot water over the promotion of its Brush Bunny Electric Toothbrush Rabbit Vibrator after deciding the best way to punt the product was to picture it beside the pleasure delivery platform of choice – an Oral-B electric toothbrush.
According to LoveHoney’s sober report into the matter, it quickly received a missive from D Young & Co – “who proudly declare themselves to be representatives of ‘The Proctor & Gamble Company family including Gilette Canada Company and Braun GmbH in relationship to trademark matters'” – and who declared:
It has come to our attention that the trademarks BRAUN and ORAL-B have been adopted and misused on the above mentioned website. Specifically, the use of the client’s trademark can be seen at the following:
http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=10535
http://www.lovehoney.co.uk/product.cfm?p=9483…..
BootnoteWe’d like to point out that The Register in no way supports the use of toothbrush-mounted sex aids and warns that improper deployment of such devices may result in personal injury if not supervised by a trained professional. We also advise LoveHoney that The Register and its vulture logo are protected by trademark, so you can forget that El Reg-branded latex gimp suit. Our lawyers are watching.
My son’s school had a talent show today. There were class, and some individual or group performances.
Charlie did a drum bit with a friend. They used plastic buckets and a metal pot.
Once again, Charlie kept the beat, while his friend kind of just wailed on them. His ability to keep the beat while distracted, the two boys were on opposite sides of the row of buckets and pots playing at the same time, is bloody amazing.
His class presentation was a kind of “skeleton dance”, with his class in black clothes with skeleton paper cutouts attached. The lights were turned off, and they were limned with black light, which was a nice effect for a few bucks of paper and cloth.
On the downside, another class did a dance number to the Villiage People’s YMCA (Which is still going through my head Aieeeeeeee!!!!!)
They then had a slide show to Whitney Houston’s Greatest Love of All, and since I didn’t want to crack, and start chanting Tekeli-li, Tekeli-li, Tekeli-li, Tekeli-li, Tekeli-li, I left to return to work.
I was going shopping tonite. My wife, my son Charlie, my daughter Natalie, and I were all in the store together.
The kids were a little bit hyper, and this was being magnified as it bounced back and forth between them, like an echo chamber.
Natalie’s birthday is coming up, and so we were getting cupcakes for a little party in her class.
Our already hyper 9 year old ran, grabbed the cupcakes, and put them in the shopping cart.
Then she grabbed the cupcakes, and ran back and put them back, to see if she could find something better.
She eventually ended up back at the cart, empty handed.
When reminded that we needed something for her party, she headed off at a sprint, back to the cupcakes.
I turned to my wife, and said, she reminds me of a hummingbird on crystal meth.
Sometimes, kids are exhausting.
I never figured that she’d play the GOOD cop in a meeting with school administrators.
My wife is a dear sweet lady. She is also a Special Ed consultant with a practice, SEDRA where she supplies Educational Evaluations, Classroom Observations, Advocacy, IEP Process Workshops, In-School Tutoring for Individuals with Special Needs, and Service Referral.
She spent half of her childhood in the Bronx, and one of her clients affectionately referred to her as a “Pit bull”.
Both of our children are on IEPs, but did not need a lawyer for our eldest, a turning 10 years old in a week girl, Natalie, for the past 3 years. We found Mark Martin for her.
Natalie has a visual perception and motor planning disorder, that results in dyslexia and dysgraphia (her hand writing is worse than mine, which means that her handwriting is the worst ever).
Our lawyer for our son, 7 and a half year old Charlie, Wayne Steedman said that it would be best if we went with another lawyer for Natalie, because having to focus on more than one child at a time tends to diffuse the lawyer’s effort.
Well, lawyers are sharks or piranhas. Wayne is more of a shark. Mark is more of a piranha.
Both are far more pleasant than one would imagine when they are YOUR carnivorous fish.
The shark glides, silently and unnoticed, until it strikes, while the piranha is a flurry of teeth, reducing a cow to bones in under a minute (why is it that they always use a cow as the unit of measure of ferocious appetites?)
While Natalie’s school, Timber Grove Elementary is a good school, it has a profoundly negative attitude towards special ed kids.
I think that it’s primarily a function of the Principal, who has been nicknamed “The Scorpion”.
There are a disproportionate number of children, who are either at special schools run by the county, or in private placements paid for by the county who are in this school’s zone.
This seems to be particularly noteworthy with regards to the male special ed students.
Considering all the costs involved in private placements, I wonder if the principal has a picture of the superintendent getting freaky with a goat.
At Natalie’s meeting, the occupational therapist (kind of a misnomer, it’s about things like writing, tying shoes, and other fine motor operations) had a report suggesting that Natalie’s services be pulled. The first time any of our side saw it was at the meeting.
I was conferencing in via phone, but even I could tell that Mark Martin, esq., was not amused.
I think that the OT might end up with a diagnosis of post traumatic stress disorder after Mark was through with her.
It put the fear of god into the rest of IEP team, so while we do not have OT goals yet, we will be doing a follow-up meeting to take care of that, it looks like Natalie will get the services she needs.
I’m not leaving, but I got a 73. The current score required is 67.
My wife might get a higher score, she has a Masters, I have a bachelors, even though I have more earning power. She’s a teacher, I’m an engineer.
Then again, if the sh%$ hits the fan, I can go to Israel under the law of return.
BTW, this machine has more processing power than NORAD did in 1967. It can make frothy drinks, but I don’t dri
nk frothy drinks.
(clickable image)