Category: Funny

Brilliant!

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Atheists sponsor a pr0n for for religious groups.

They are arguing that religious texts are in their own way violent pornography.

Speaking as someone who is religious, I understand that holy scriptures say different things to different generations, and that the moral and social development of people a few millennia ago rather closely resembles what we would call today “psychopathic sadists.”

As such, my opinion of people who find look at these works, and take them literally as “inerrant” and “perfect” is not particularly charitable.

Deep Thought

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Received via email:

TRIP TO COSTCO

Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder Dog and was in the checkout line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had an elephant?

So since I’m retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn’t have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again.

I added that I probably shouldn’t, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I’d lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me.

I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter’s ass and a car hit us both.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard.

Costco won’t let me shop there anymore.

Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say.

Forward this (especially) to all your retired friends……it will be their Laugh for the day

OK, I Might Consider Donating to Fiorina

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Rachael Maddow’s take


Full ad

If just because she is an even bigger disaster as a candidate than she was as CEO of HP, where staffers broke out into “Ding, dong, the witch is dead” upon announcement of her firing.

You see, she has followed up the worst political website ever with the worst political ad ever.

I’m beginning to wonder if former HPers are working on her campaign ad just to f%$# with her.

In any case, when one considers her history at HP, where she demoralized and hurt the company but got pay increases, or her history at AT&T, where her staff falsified sales data, she is a poster child for over-privileged senior management, and so would be dead meat on the table in the general.

But right not, she is flinging sheep at Republicans, so she’s doing “God’s work.”

Funny Headline of the Day

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EU-funded think tanks defend their credibility

It’s not just that they are government funded, it’s the whole idea of think-tanks and credibility being juxtaposed.

Maybe the American Enterprise Institute, the Heritage Foundation, the Cato Institute, the Manhattan Institute, and of course the original wanker think tank, the Brookings Institution, have soured me on the whole concept.

I just see them as exercises in cronyism.

Think tanks have no credibility.

[on edit]
There are any number of advocacy organizations that do good things, but they aren’t think tanks, they actually work in the context of the regulatory process to get things done, rather than just crank out paper for whoever pays their bills.

A good example is Public Knowledge, where they spend a lot of time actually doing things like making arguments before the FCC on regulatory issues.

There are good people in think tanks, but they do their good work elsewhere.